What It’s Really Like To Live With Anxiety

People With Anxiety are Not Angry

Anxiety has a way of making us react in a way that might seem like aggression or anger. Actually, anxiety gives us bursts of energy to deal with the stress of a situation. It can make our voice louder as we try to communicate something, or we may speak more quickly. We may use the same tone as someone who is angry, but it’s not intentional. If I’m feeling anxious about a situation, I may get short with someone even though they are not at all the source of my anxiety.

They are Compassionate to Other People

Anxious people like us are very compassionate, deeply considering other people’s feelings. We have a heightened sense of connection with people that are going through difficult times. We understand what it is to have sensitivities. This allows us to relate well to anyone dealing with a crisis or tragedy in their life. As I have overcome so much due to my own anxiety, I can relate to many difficult situations that other people experience. I’m also happy to listen and give advice on how I dealt with a similar problem.

Fear Takes Control of Their Actions

We may leave a party quickly- or maybe even leave the country- as sometimes anxiety comes on so strongly, we need to separate ourselves from those we care about. This isn’t to punish anyone in our lives; it’s what we need for ourselves at the time. I travel a lot and sometimes my anxiety becomes overwhelming. I have gotten on a lot of planes because I was afraid of my surroundings, due to anxiety.

They are Not Selfish People

While you may think someone you know with anxiety is a selfish person, that simply isn’t true. We care a lot about what people think, to the point that it can bring on anxiety. Many times we do everything we can to avoid any negativity in a situation because we simply don’t like the trouble. We often excuse ourselves from a room if we have an attack of anxiety. We often internalize our pain so we don’t bother anyone with our struggles. I wrote an article for a mother who lost her child to anxiety. He wasn’t able to get the help he needed quickly enough because he didn’t want to worry his family. In this situation, his selflessness was his own worst enemy because it prevented him from accessing the resources that could have assisted him, but in most other cases, selflessness is an admirable quality.

Anxiety is Not a Choice- But it’s Still Manageable

Anxiety is not something we chose to have. It is, however, manageable. There are ways that we can relax so that even in situations of heightened stress, we can remain calm and deal with it. This is the strength that it is possible for us to acquire as we learn to cope with anxiety. I used to lash out at people I traveled with because I became so anxious that there was danger in a situation that was considered safe. Through breathing techniques I was able to calm my body down, and by centering myself, I could retell the story in my mind and make it less scary. It’s a daily practice and something I do when I’m not feeling anxious also. Because of this, when something uncomfortable does happen, I am prepared.

They are Not Weak People

People that have anxiety are not weak people at all; we are likely much stronger than many of the people around us realize. Our ability to cope with a sometimes debilitating illness proves we are tough. We not only deal with life’s real obstacles, we do it with a handicap of sorts. Still, we have normal jobs and have relationships while fighting through sometimes uncontrollable feelings. We are just as successful, intelligent, and lovable as those without anxiety.

I have grown a lot from my anxiety and now that I understand how it’s affected my life, I am stronger. I have control and the experience of overcoming anxiety has allowed me to be a better version of myself.

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