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quinta-feira, outubro 22, 2015

Queirós, Eça

Tema: Crítica
As obras de arte devem falar «por si mesmas», explicar-se «por si mesmas», sem terem necessidade de pôr ao lado um cicerone. Acompanhar um livro de versos de crítica «já feita» é querer impor um guia à emoção do leitor. O leitor detesta isso

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Lowell, James

Tema: Experiência
Um espinho de experiência vale toda a selva de avisos

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Kafka, Franz

Teoricamente existe uma hipótese de felicidade plena: acreditar no que há de indestrutível em si próprio e não ter de lutar para o alcançar.

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Pessoa, Fernando

A felicidade está fora da felicidade

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Dantas, Inácio

Para ser feliz ninguém precisa ter tudo, e, sim, ter tudo o que precisa

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Sévigné, Marie

No amor o futuro faz esquecer o passado

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Barca, Pedro

O amor que não é loucura não é amor

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Pessoa, Joaquim

Beijar-te é a forma mais doce de sorrir.

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Stael, (Madame de)

A liberdade e o amor são incompatíveis. Quem ama é sempre escravo

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A Comic That Makes You View Depression From A Different Perspective

socially anxious

Depression is a serious issue. However, if we look at depression through a different perspective, especially a comic perspective, we can see another light side of it. I hope you find it inspirational. It sure has helped me see a new side of depression. Be sure to seek help when you need it. There is nothing wrong with admitting that you aren’t perfect. I just hope you can find some hope and inspiration through this as depression is not easy to deal with.

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Featured photo credit: Victor Bezrukov via imcreator.com

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5 Ways to Improve Your Work-Life Balance Right Now

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We’ve all heard that work-life balance is about being balanced across a period of time vs. at a specific moment.  But we also know that those day to day moments can be pretty excruciating. While finding a more flexible position, planning a vacation, moving to shorten the commute, or remembering that this busy period will pass are all on the radar, what can we do today – right now, without drastic changes in our lives or jobs – to make things better? Try these 5 things to help you feel more balanced right now:

Don’t work every evening.

There used to be a time when “quittin’ time” meant just that. Office technology has made huge advances in recent years:  we no longer have to be disconnected or unable to work when traveling, sick, or working from home. But that doesn’t mean that we don’t have to ever stop working. It may be part of your workplace culture to log back in every evening after dinner, but just don’t do it for a few nights and see what happens. Take time after work to relax and focus on other areas of your life. You’ll know when something is enough of an emergency to keep working after hours. A general rule of thumb I use is if this is something someone would have picked up the phone and called me about ten years ago after house, then it’s worth being responsive.  If not, it can wait until the next business day.

Don’t look at email / monitor work communications when you’re not at work.

This is a tough one. To simplify our lives, we’ve combined our personal and workplace devices. The endless pings of emails and instant messages could drive one to insanity or exuberance:  studies show that the simple act of checking your email is addictive. Even if you’re not on your computer working, continually monitoring work communications means that you’re not able to disconnect from your job and fully focus on other aspects of your life.  So, cut the cord. Tell your staff, manager, or colleagues that the best way to reach you when you’re not in the office is by phone. And while this may seem scary at first, it’s really not. Think back to times that you’ve tried to reach someone by email or text message. If they didn’t get back to you right away and it was urgent, you called them. If not, you waited until the next business day. To help break the habit, set a fifteen minute block in the evening or early in the morning where you shift your focus to checking emails and other office communications, if you absolutely have to. After a few weeks, you’ll probably discover that it’s not needed.

Treat weekends like vacations.

Weekends are your time to rest, recover, and recuperate. Don’t waste them. Set a drop dead time for yourself (e.g. 5pm on Friday) when you will officially stop working on office related work. Then, go enjoy your weekend. Resist the urge to get back online on Sunday nights – this is a habit made popular by those that want to “get ahead” of the week. It’s not needed, necessary, or even practical most of the time. Enjoy your Sunday evening and return to work on Monday morning refreshed and ready to go. The major plus of not working on Sunday night: on Monday morning, your email will have the full picture from all the responses and information that got disseminated by those who couldn’t stay offline the previous evening, so you’ll be fully caught up.

Always make yourself whole.

Many people think that giving up personal time in the evenings or weekends is what’s expected from their jobs – and that may be true sometimes. But it’s not expected that you never take that time back and make yourself whole again. If you have a rough couple of weeks while a major project is in full swing, plan a day or two off as comp days after the project launches. Use that time to treat yourself, catch up on personal responsibilities, or just rest and recover. Organizations will take what you give them, so don’t give them everything. And if they take more than their fair share for a little while, take it back for yourself when it makes sense.

Use mobility for productivity and flexibility… not to stay “always connected.”

Technology has changed the way we work and it’s up to use to use it in a way that’s most effective. This means rethinking the purpose of mobility. Being able to work from anywhere makes sense when you are traveling, or need to escape to a quieter, less distracting environment to work on a presentation or whitepaper, or when you need to finish up something you couldn’t complete since you had to leave the office early to pick up your child from school. Using mobile technology in a way that enhances your life is important; don’t use it as a way to extend your work day unnecessarily, or to stay connected when you really should be focusing on something else.

These five things are easy to implement and don’t require any major job or life changes. And bringing them into your life may have an unexpected effect: you may be more engaged and perform better at work! Staying balanced and making sure you take time for yourself each day will enusre that the time you spend at work is the more productive and fulfilling.

Featured photo credit: Working / Adrian Scottow via flickr.com

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What It’s Really Like To Live With Migraines

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For those who have never experienced a migraine, it is hard to fathom the pain of this intense condition. It is more than just a bad headache, since it can last for days and include light and sound sensitivity, nausea, and vomiting. Television star Marsha Cross and movie star Ben Affleck are two celebrities that have struggled publicly with migraines. Read on to clear up some common misconceptions about this debilitating ailment.

There is no simple test to determine migraines

Unfortunately, there is no medical test to help determine whether an individual does in fact have migraines. Symptoms and a family history are the best indicators that a migraine is the culprit for someone who has been suffering. Even then, it can be difficult to pinpoint the cause of a person’s headaches because there are similar conditions such as cluster, sinus, or tension headaches that can exhibit very similar symptoms. It it important for those who might believe that they are suffering from migraines to keep a detailed journal of their symptoms, including frequency and intensity, to share with their medical physician, since every individual case is different.

There is no such thing as a common frequency for the symptoms

Depending on the individual, the frequency of their migraines can vary greatly — from once a year to once a day. There are numerous factors that can cause an episode, including the weather, certain types of food, the environment, and stress. Individuals who suffer from migraines can usually anticipate what will bring one on and can learn to find ways to avoid or lessen these situations. With the advancement of technology, there are many different applications and websites that are available to help out those who suffer from this illness.

There is not one pill that works as a cure-all for everyone

Like any other illness, there are various ways to treat a migraine depending on the individual. For smaller migraines, sometimes over-the-counter pain medications will do the trick. For more intense migraines, there are a lot of different prescriptions that can be given. There are also prevention medications that can help migraine suffers ward off any future episodes and help reduce any associated nausea. Also, just because one medication might not seem to work, it is important to keep trying different ones until you find one that works for your specific case.

More than just Caucasian women suffer from migraines

It is true that Caucasian women more commonly suffer from migraines, but that does not mean everyone else is in the clear. Women of other races have the chance of developing this condition to a lower degree and men have a lesser chance, but it is still possible. It is believed that women are more likely to develop migraines due to hormones. It is also often believed that women who are high-achievers and have type-A personalities are more likely to suffer. However, women of all temperaments can indeed suffer from migraines.

There is no proof that chocolate triggers migraines

It is a common misconception that women who suffer from migraines will bring on an episode by eating chocolate. While this can be true for some women, the opposite can be true as well. Chocolate contains caffeine that can actually help to alleviate the pain of a migraine and some women swear by this sweet treat to cure their head woes. The darker the chocolate, the better, since milk chocolate is not as nutritious as its darker counterpart. There are, of course, common foods that can trigger a migraine, including red wine, aged cheese, and any dishes laden with monosodium glutamate (MSG).

Featured photo credit: Flickr via flickr.com

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9 Creative Things Every Woman Can Do To Show Their Love To Their Men

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As women, we are so used to allowing a man to tell us and to show us how much he loves us, but how many of us give thought on how we can show him that we love him. In order to build a strong, respectful and lasting relationship it is important, for us women, to show our men that we love and appreciate them in our lives.

Here are 9 creative ways to get you started.

1. Write Creative Notes To Him

Sometimes finding the right words to say when you want to say something from the heart can be daunting. Make the process fun and flirtatious so that it helps you to let him know how you feel about him. Don’t be afraid to add a funny picture into the note – something that will surprise him and make him laugh.

2. Let Him Be Independent

Being in a relationship is not about needing to be stuck with one another 24/7. Be OK with him following his own interests and going out with his friends. Showing him that you trust him will raise his appreciation and trust in you and your relationship.

3. Encourage Him To Follow His Dreams

Support him to achieve the things that he wants to do in his life. By helping him and trusting him to see his potential and not holding him back tells him that you care and love him. This is something that will also help to strength your relationship and his love for you.

4. Make A Note Of The Little Things That He Enjoys

Take note of the little things that he likes or does such as, how he takes his coffee, what he likes watching/reading etc. These little things show him that you are interested in him and care about him and they add value and meaning to a relationship, as the little things count.

5. Tell Him That You Love Him And How He Makes You Feel

Don’t get caught up in assumptions that he knows how you feel about him. By letting your man know how you feel about him and how he makes you feel will boost his self confidence and let him know that he’s loved and appreciated by you.

6. Cook Or Bake Him His Favorite Meal/Cake

They say ‘The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach’, so cook or bake him his favorite meal or cake. This will make him feel special at the thought of this, as he knows that you have gone through all this trouble just for him.

7. Wear Something That You Know He Loves Seeing You In

Wearing an outfit that you know he loves seeing you in, will not only make you feel special but it will make him feel like he is the only man. His confidence and love for you will be raised when he knows that you have made an effort to dress up for his eyes only.

8. Compliment Him On The Things That You Love About Him

Tell him the things that you love about him and the things that you appreciate when he does them for you.  By giving him positive encouragement, you will be giving him the reassurance of how you feel about him and making him feel cherished and valued.

9. Talk To Him About The Things That Are Worrying You

Give him the opportunity to be your knight in shining armor. Seek his advise by sharing the things in your life that you are worried about. He will love the chance to be able to be there for you and show you how much he cares and wants to protect you and take your pain away.

Featured photo credit: Brandon Warren via albumarium.com

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10 Habits Of Likable And Influential People

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While there are many attributes associated with good leadership, likability is not one that immediately springs to mind. This is an underrated and often undervalued characteristic among individuals in senior roles, primarily because it contrasts with our ingrained image of leaders being dominant and assertive.

Good and sustainable leadership depends on an ability to influence others, however, so that teams share in a specific vision and work towards a common goal. This cannot be achieved successfully by those who rule through fear alone, as people are more inclined to follow an individual who is likable and charming in equal measure. In this respect, likability is one of the key attributes for any ambitious leaders.

So what exactly are the primary habits and traits that distinguish likable people with a capacity for influencing others from other types of people?

1. They Have a Positive and Infectious Mental Attitude

Cynicism is a natural state for some, especially in the world of work and commercial leadership. From the emotional drain and inconvenience of excessive meetings to the hidden agendas of others, we can easily become suspicious of those around us and cynical about their motivations. It can be easy to give into this, but likable individuals tend to maintain a positive mindset that is infectious and establishes greater levels of morale.

2. They Always Take Positive Lessons from Failure

This positive outlook manifests itself in multiple ways, although it is most obvious in times of adversity. More specifically, likable influencers seek out positive lessons from failure, rather than brooding over their shortcomings and developing feelings of resentment. According to inspirational author Napoleon Hill (who wrote the famous Think and Grow Rich), those with a likable persona are more likely to express gratitude for having gained a measure of wisdom that would not have come without failure.

3. They are Inquisitive

Likable people are good at communications, both in terms of sharing their own ideas and listening to others. So rather than focusing on their own viewpoint and simply waiting for the next opportunity to talk, they listen to your perspective and digest its meaning. This is often manifested by an inquisitive nature and a tendency to ask questions, as this reinforces their interest in what is being said and underlines how they care for others.

4. The Always Speak in a Considered and Friendly Tone

On a similar note, likable people who are good influencers also tend to speak in a deliberate and confident manner. This immediately gives their voice a pleasing and reassuring sound, whether they are speaking to a single individual or a larger group. Such a tone and communication style also suggests a sense of self-control, which in turn inspires trust from those who are listening.

5. They Maintain Composure at All Times

The working day is full of minor frustrations, as is the wider world around us. From commonplace office time thieves with their drive-by work requests, to the petty rudeness of others, it is easy to become frustrated and lose our composure in front of others. Likable individuals are able to maintain their poise at all times, however, avoiding those unnecessary overreactions and potential confrontations.

6. They are Openminded and Accepting of Change

We have already discussed the impact of cynicism on individuals and those around them, but it is important to note that this also creates a closed mind that is resistant to certain ideas. It also prevents people from interacting with those who are different, denying them the opportunity to experience personal growth. Likable individuals have no such issues, as they retain a positive and open minded attitude that is receptive to change and difference.

7. They are Able to Suppress Negative Thoughts

While expressive people tend to be honest by nature, this can be detrimental when it comes to interacting with others. While likable individuals are capable of expressing themselves, they also have a sense of self-discipline that enables them to suppress negative thoughts and avoid sharing these with others. This avoids causing unnecessary offence to others, which is crucial to maintaining good morale and productive relationships.

8. They Don’t Seek Attention

There are few characteristics that are more distressing than attention seeking, whether in the workplace or at home. This stems from an underlying desire to be noticed, and achieve notoriety for both positive and negative behavior. Given that this is such an unappealing quality, it should come as no surprise that likable individuals are more likely to avoid attracting attention unless it is for a selfless cause or a hard-earned accomplishment.

9. They Praise Others in a Genuine and Believable Way

While praise is always welcome and an excellent way of improving morale, false praise will create cynicism and mistrust on a large scale. This is where likable people often excel as individuals, as they deliver praise whenever it is deserved, without being excessive or giving the impression of being false. This is an excellent communication skill to have, as you must be able to deliver praise in a believable and genuine tone in order for your comments to be well received.

10. They Trust Someone Enough to Point Out Their Flaws

On a final note, it is important to reaffirm that likability is not a parlor trick or a facade that can be adopted. Rather than leaders pretending to be likable, they earn this praise because they care about their behavior, reputation and the way in which they are perceived by others. They are also likely to have a close confidante or network of supporters that are entirely honest with them at all times, offering feedback on their flaws and potential areas for improvement.

Featured photo credit: Pepe Pont / Flickr via flickr.com

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8 Fun Things To Do With Your Kids For Halloween

Image courtesy of epSos .de at Flickr creative commons.

While traditional methods of celebrating Halloween by letting your children wander the neighborhood are becoming less advisable because of safety concerns, you can still find ways to make the upcoming holiday exciting and fun for young children.

Creative parents can come up with of some fun DIY activities that the whole family can enjoy.

Here are 8 Ways to Make Halloween Fun for Your Kids:

1. Decorate pumpkins

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Every kid loves to pick out their own pumpkin at the grocery store or a local produce stand. As a mother of 3 children, I have always let it be an opportunity for them to express themselves by picking the kind that appeals to them, whether it is big or little or odd shaped, doesn’t matter. Decorating the pumpkins can be a great family tradition to build on every year.

For young children, especially, I do not recommend carving the pumpkins. This can be a risk for injuries. If you just buy them as is, and decorate the outside, the pumpkins will last longer. There are so many neat ways to dress up pumpkins. You can use markers, glitter glue, acrylic paint, buttons, beads, various kinds of string, cords and cloth. Anything and everything can make pumpkin look cool.

Try new ways to decorate them every year to make the event more fun. Let the children drawn their own designs and be supportive and excited by what they come up with, so they can feel proud of their original art.

2. Fix up the yard

Here is one of the easiest ways to celebrate Halloween. Use the trees or shrubs in your yard to hang lights, figurines or ghosts. You can even have of all different types. As long as you have a photo that can be converted to a digital file, there are many places to order figurines from that will look lifelike and scary, especially when they have lights around them. Use your imagination and let the children help with the yard decor.

How about a wheelbarrow full of dirt and a skeleton? Or you could create what looks like an old graveyard. Use whatever you have on hand and get the whole family involved. If you have a front porch you can make it look like a spooky mansion. You can hang cobwebs, bats, lights and decorate with various kinds of homemade candles. You can make a scarecrow type of figure that sits in a chair. Welcome anything your kids can think of as a good idea, as long as it is safe.

3. Make their own costumes

Help the children decide on the type of costume they want. This is one of the funnest things for them to do. Give them a few ideas, based on movies or toys they own and see what you can come up with together. Face painting is more fun than making masks and it is inexpensive. Visit the nearest dollar store and let the kids shop for cheap decorations they want. Stores are a great place to visit, just for ideas. You could buy already made costumes, or you can get ideas, and after visiting goodwill stores, buy enough inexpensive items to make up the costumes yourself.

4. Bake treats together

Any holiday is better with some kind of treat you can let your children make with you in the kitchen. Some ideas you can do are baking various kinds of cookies, muffins, or desserts made with fruit and yogurt, or ice cream. You could also do caramel apples. The funnest part will be using nuts, candy, and other toppings to decorate your items with. Here are some other ideas for baking. You can also do various kinds of crafts and there are tons of ideas to choose from on the internet.

5. Have a sleepover

The most exciting thing you can do for your kids is to help them plan a sleepover for Halloween. At any age, kids love to have their friends over from school, church or daycare. It may take a little time to plan it out, but believe me, it is the best thing you can do. You can make the invitations by hand, help them decide who to invite, and talk over ideas about possible craft activities to have or games to play. You might even want to choose a party theme.

For younger aged children, as parents, you will need to do most of the planning, but as your children get older, let them take over the responsibilities. Teach them to learn about the costs involved in putting a party together, so they won’t go crazy with ideas, and they will learn to stay within a budget limit you decide.

6. Make a spooky room

image courtesy of slworking2 at Flickr

Even if you don’t have a sleepover, one of the cheapest ways to create Halloween fun, is to use one room in your house as a spooky room. You and your children can decorate it in outrageous ways, like putting up cardboard forms, boxes and other decor, and plastering the room with spider webs and mini lights. Make sure the lights are not too close to any other materials that could be a fire hazard. One idea is to make the entry to the room so small, that the children have to squeeze in there and go through a type of maze.

7. Get teens involved

An easy way to up the level of fun at your party, or even if you don’t have a party planned, is to get your teenagers involved, or even your neighbor children. Have the older children dress up in scary costumes and surprise the younger ones by popping out suddenly and chasing them around in a game of touch tag. It’s easy, it’s fun and it will be very exciting for the youngsters.

8. Make a scary video

Homemade videos are another project you could do. With most cell phones, you can easily make a video of just about anything. You can record all the activities your family does together, or you can work on things with your children, and have an older child operate the phone or video camera. There are many ideas for making fun videos and having contests during the party is one idea of the activities you could record.

Summary

No matter what you choose from the variety of activities suggested by the 8 ideas above, just make sure to pay attention to how your children deal with stress. A younger child may not be ready for too much excitement. Or, they may get scared and upset by the costumes. Remember to talk to your children ahead of time, to make sure they are OK, with whatever activities that are planned. Keep in mind that the main objective is to spend time together as a family, or for them to get to see their friends. The most important thing you can do is make it simple, good old fashioned fun for everyone.

Featured photo credit: image courtesy of epSos.de at Flickr Creative Commons via flickr.com

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