Emerson, Ralph

Tema: Grandes
Nenhum grande homem se queixa de falta de oportunidades

via @notiun

Cardoso, Miguel Esteves

Tema: Casamento
Os casamentos estão para os números e para a sorte como as rifas e as lotarias. Havendo amor, passa-se a semana a pensar que se vai ganhar e depois há um dia em que se perde - quando há discussões - seguido de mais uma semana com uma nova esperança. O amor está lá sempre, quer se ganhe ou se perca. O amor corresponde ao jogo em si. Há jogos sucessivos com resultados diferentes, mas o jogo é sempre o mesmo. Aos jogadores apenas se pede o impossível, facilmente concedido: acreditar que podem ganhar.

via @notiun

Timmermans, Felix

Tema: Filosofia
Ser filósofo não significa escrever, significa viver

via @notiun

Caeiro, Alberto

Penso em ti, murmuro o teu nome e não sou eu: sou feliz.

via @notiun

Dostoievski, Fiodor

No nosso planeta só podemos amar sofrendo e através da dor. Não sabemos amar de outro modo nem conhecemos outro tipo de amor

via @notiun

Moravia, Alberto

O amor pode fazer tudo, e também o contrário de tudo

via @notiun

8 Little Changes You Should Make Now For Your Lifelong Success

Do you want to change your life so you can achieve lifelong success? Many people want to improve their lives but are unsure where they should start. However, you can change your life today and start working towards success and happiness — check out 8 little changes you should make here.

1. Start working on achieving a life-long dream

Most people have life goals, such as writing a book or starting their own business. These goals are hugely important to them, but yet they take a back seat so other demands can take priority. Don’t sell your dreams short — start working on achieving them today. Ask yourself these questions to get the ball rolling: What is my life-long dream? Can I start working on it now? What can I do this year to work towards my life-long dream?

2. Find a good sleeping pattern and stick to it

It may be tempting to stay up late and sleep in during your weekends, but oversleeping even for a few days can totally reset your sleeping cycle. Avoid getting tired later in the day and being less productive by making a change and getting up and going to sleep at a similar time every day. This also helps with most sleep issues, so there are many benefits to being consistent with your sleeping pattern.

3. Make saving money one of your priorities

One important change you need to make for lifelong success is making saving money one of your main priorities. Life is full of the unexpected, and it is important to have some money saved up for an emergency. If you never need the money for an unexpected problem, you can use the money as part of your retirement — a win-win situation.

4. Start exercising

Regular exercise has multiple benefits: it controls weight, improves mood, boosts energy, and combats disease and health issues. There are many different kinds of exercise you can consider, including running, swimming, walking, cycling, hiking, and weightlifting. This is a change you want to commit to for the rest of your life, so it is important to find an exercise you enjoy.

5. Stop comparing yourself to others

The world is filled with so many people with many different skills and talents. When you focus on how other people are doing, your own goals stop being your priority. Instead of being hard on yourself and thinking about the lives of others, focus on achieving your own goals and happiness.

6. Aim to learn something new every day

Learning doesn’t have to stop when you finish school. The world is filled with things you don’t know about, so focus on continuing to educate yourself. This is a great change to make as it can advance your area, open your mind, and even show you new perspectives. There are many ways you can educate yourself as an adult, from podcasts to seminars to reading a book.

7. Document your life

An important part of success is appreciating the good things in your life. From keeping a journal to taking pictures, there is great happiness in documenting life. When you are older, you will treasure being able to see your memories, and they will even be useful now. If you are feeling down after a tough day, looking over memories of happy times will help to put a smile back on your face.

8. Decide what you are passionate about

What does success mean to you? It is okay if you don’t know what you want to do with your life right now, but identifying your passions and values will help you to live a happy and successful life. If you are unsure where to start, sit down with a piece of paper and write down your priorities in life, what you think success means, and how you would like to improve your life. Good luck!

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How To Lose Weight Without Controlling Your Appetite

Looking for a sure-fire way to shed a few pounds? Eat less.

Okay, while this strategy might be effective, putting it into practice is admittedly harder than it sounds. There are many physiological, psychological, and social cues that can spark feelings of hunger. Trying to suppress your appetite and overcome the urge to grab a snack can quickly become exhausting and lead to disappointment.

Instead of relying on your willpower to keep your appetite under control, here is a 5-step process that will help you lose weight without focusing on how much you’re eating.

1. Boost your metabolism with a few minutes of exercise

One obvious way to counter-balance the number of calories you eat in a given day is to exercise. Research has shown that exercise can boost your metabolism by up to 37%, meaning that your body will continue burning up calories long after your exercise session has ended.

Even better, you don’t have to spend hours at the gym to reap the benefits. Short bursts of intense activity can stimulate your metabolism even more than a full-blown workout.

Here’s one example of a 5-minute workout that will turn your body into a calorie-burning machine.

2. Start with the right appetizer before each meal

Not all appetizers are created equal, so it’s important to be clear: filling up on pre-meal garlic bread isn’t your ticket to losing weight! Instead, choose a lower-calorie appetizer, such as soup or salad, before every meal.

Eating a healthy appetizer will help you feel more full when it comes time to chow down on the main course. Main dishes often consist of higher-calorie foods, which is why starting with a lighter soup or salad has been shown to reduce the total calories consumed at a meal by 12% or more.

3. Include at least one super-filling food

Some foods are very satiating, meaning that they fill you up faster and keep you feeling full for longer than other foods you might choose. The most satiating foods are generally those that are high in water content, high in fibre, or are loaded with protein.

In order to keep your hunger in check, it’s important to make sure your meals include at least one satiating food. See the infographic below to find foods that will satisfy your hunger without leading to a subsequent sugar crash.

4. Slow down by chewing more

Many people overeat simply because they eat too quickly. It is important to give your brain time to recognize how much and what type of food you’ve just eaten so that it can regulate the hunger you feel.

One very simple way to slow down your meals is by chewing more. Here’s a good rule of thumb to follow:

“Drink your food and chew your drinks.” — Lorene Sauro, Holistic Nutritionist

This is suggesting that you should chew your food so much that it is liquified in your mouth. This will require more chewing for certain foods (e.g. meat) and less for others (e.g. pasta). As for the suggestion to “chew your drinks”…

5. Avoid consuming liquid calories

Drinking sugary drinks like soda, alcohol, or even fruit juice is a guaranteed way to rack up calories without ever feeling very satisfied. That’s why these high-sugar calorie sources are sometimes called “stealth calories” — they add up quickly without you even realizing it.

To effortlessly keep your appetite in check, refer back to our rule of thumb: “Drink your food and chew your drinks.”

Drinks that have substance, such as smoothies or pulpy vegetable juices, are excellent for weight management because they are often high in fibre. Unlike fruit juices, which are processed to have the most fibrous part of the fruit removed, a “chewable” drink includes whole fruits and vegetables. Here’s one to try today:

Featured photo credit: Yummy/Alessandro Valli via flickr.com

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10 Ways To Meet Your Needs And Make Others Happy At The Same Time

“Happiness is a choice that requires efforts at times.”-Aeschylus.

Making choices is a hard thing to do. What could be even harder than that? Saying “no”, if you are a people-pleaser.

Some of us are hardwired with the need to say yes all the time which puts us in hard situations at times. When it is about either meeting your needs or pleasing others, you find yourself in a tricky situation.

You are afraid of being rude and you want to help because you are a kind soul. You don’t want to decline any requests you get but also you have your own needs to fulfill. The moment feels like it’s a “lose-lose” situation whichever option you choose. Finding a way out of such situations is a tough job.

Here below are some ways to meet your needs and make others happy at the same time.

1. Know the difference between self-care and selfishness

You don’t want to look selfish when you decline a request but self-care isn’t selfishness. Avoiding stressful moments isn’t selfishness – rather it is self-care. Selfishness is when you indulge too much in yourself without caring for the strings attached to you.

It isn’t healthy if you keep ignoring your own needs just because you are too good to say “no” or you have picked up a habit of saying “yes” to everything. You can’t care for others if you don’t take care of yourself first.

2. Realize that you have a choice

When you find yourself in a situation, reluctant to say “no” to a request, the first thing you should bear in mind is that you are free to make your own choice.

You don’t always have to say “yes” to propositions that conflict with your needs. You can choose to say “no” and any reasonable person will respect your choice. The choice is yours. You don’t really need to sacrifice your needs to make others happy. It’s just that you need a little self-care at the moment so that you can be of much more help to them in the future.

3. Propose something else

Now that you have made your choice to decline the request, everything else from that moment onwards depends only on the way you present your choice to the other party. Support your decision with good reasons and suggest something else to help.

This shows your willingness to help but unfortunately, you can’t take them up on their request. The notion is to keep everyone happy. If you can’t give your time to the request, perhaps suggest someone else who could tend to it. That ought to keep your nose out of it.

4. Present yourself non-aggressively

You have to make sure that you choose only the polite words as you explain yourself to the other person. Sometimes, pushy people tend to get on our nerves but presenting yourself angry and aggressive will certainly play against you in any situation. It is not different in this situation.

It would be wise to avoid dealing with such people. The wiser thing to do would be to anticipate the request and to decline it gently before they even get the opportunity to put it through to you. Anger is the worst enemy of mankind. Keep calm at all times and tackle the situation with your wit.

5. Understand that you are of equal worth to anybody else

Do not undermine yourself. You don’t have to agree to everything that other people say just because you feel that they are worth more than yourself. That’s the first step towards your peace of mind. Do not succumb to bullying or whining. If you don’t respect yourself, it opens the door for others to disrespect you as well.

We have been taught to “give” and “love” and never to expect anything from anyone, but you can always give and love and expect everything from yourself. Know your worth and don’t be afraid to reject requests at times when it matters.

6. Set priorities and clear boundaries

Ask yourself “What are the most important things to me?” – then schedule them accordingly. Knowing your priorities helps you take the right decision.

A rather clinical approach to take care of the situation would be to weight your needs against the need of the other party and decide on whichever option is likely to bring the greater value of happiness. Know your limits and set boundaries to keep yourself within your comfort zone.

7. Be assertive

Assertiveness is the character of leaders. When you voice out your thoughts with a good deal of assertion, you paint a good image of yourself in people’s mind. Then, people tend to go with whatever you say. Be firm and not very apologetic. Your strong persona does all the work for you here.

But if your statements seem to lack respect, it backfires on you. People take it for rudeness. So, make sure you are being polite and respectful. It helps a lot if you practice choosing the right words for the right scenario.

8. Understand that the happier you are, the more capable you are of making others happy

A positive energy radiates out when you are happy. Happiness is contagious.

Try and be happy with the choices you make. Happy people make other people happy. If you don’t make yourself happy first, you won’t be able to make anyone else happy. When your loved ones see you happy, it brings happiness in them as well.

9. Learn and accept the fact that sometimes making compromise is a must

Understand that sometimes compromises must be made. It’s all a matter of priorities. If for instance, you’re busy building your website, that’s clearly important. But what if your friend calls in that his home is on fire and he needs you to help? That’s not only important but also urgent. So you have to leave your job and compromise. In other words, sometimes what people are asking of you could be of higher priority to be attended to than your own needs.

You should make a compromise if the request outweighs your needs. Buddha said, “Being generous, just helping one’s relatives and being blameless in one’s actions; this is the best good luck”

10. Go easy on yourself

Realize that you can’t be everything to everyone. Acknowledge that you can’t do everything, after all, everybody has limits. Explain your reasons sincerely. Keep it simple and go easy on yourself.

Avoid the self-conflict by being sincere to yourself. Self-soothe by telling yourself that “what I did is in the best interest of everybody”. You’ll do just fine in every situation.

Featured photo credit: Smiling Girl via upload.wikimedia.org

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Be Assertive: 10 Ways To Stop Forgetting About Yourself

Assertiveness has become a bit of a buzzword. We constantly hear about the benefits of being more assertive. Assertiveness enables us to take care of ourselves without being overbearing.

There is research being done on the delicate balance between being passive and aggressive. Ultimately the “assertive you” will boil down to knowing your self worth and practicing the behaviors of being more assertive.

There are many strategies for being more assertive. In this post I would like to share some of the small, specific things you can start doing today to be more assertive without turning into an aggressive butthole.

Start with “I” statements

Rather than being with a “You” when talking to someone, start with “I.” This shows that you are being accountable for yourself and sharing what you think and need.

Example: Instead of saying, “You keep interrupting me” you can change it to “I would like to finish what I was going to say without being interrupted”

Make your requests more intentional

Instead of asking people if they wanna do something (“you wanna go over that presentation?”), show your intention and make the request clear.

Example: “please review the presentation before the meeting”

Share the facts that you notice

When you see your colleague acting lazy or disengaged from work, it is a good idea to give feedback on what you notice. The impulse may be to say “hey, why are you being so lazy!”

Don’t give in. Keep things factual and share what you notice.

Example: “I noticed that you’ve come in half an hour late 3 times this week.”

Take a breath and assertively ask to think

Being assertive doesn’t always mean you have to have an immediate answer. There will be times where you need to process what is being said and it is okay to say, “let me think for a second.” This response shows that you acknowledged the request and gives you a few moments to gather your thoughts.

Politely say no without explanation

This is not a time for maybes. Be direct when you say no when you mean it. Make sure you body language is congruent with your words. Don’t feel like you need to give a reason if you don’t want to.

Acknowledge criticism

This doesn’t mean that you agree or disagree with it. It does show that you have listened to the other person and can take it into consideration before sharing your opinion.

Cut out hedge statements

Saying things like “this is only my opinion” or “I’m not sure if I’m right here” discredits your opinion. You can cut these out and just go straight to what you think. This will come off as being more confident in what you are saying.

Offer an alternative

There will be times when you want to help someone out, but not at that moment. Use this as an opportunity to be assertive and suggest something that works for you.

Example: “I’d love to help out, unfortunately that deadline won’t work for me. Is it flexible?”

Another example: “It sounds interesting. I’m not comfortable with ABC. Can we discuss other ways I might contribute?”

Study effective communication strategies

Communication is the heart of assertiveness. Making the study of communication a daily habit is good practice you can implement. You’ll learn many effective ways to express what you want and gain agreements.

Stand like superman

Amy Cuddy gave a powerful ted talk on how body language impacts how others see us and also how we feel within ourselves. Standing in confident postures can actually change how you feel. So the next time you are preparing to be assertive in a meeting, strike a pose first.

Featured photo credit: Highways Agency via flickr.com

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10 Actions You Can Take to Get Rich at an Incredibly High Speed

Do you want to be rich? Many people believe that being financially successful is pure luck, but there are many things that anybody can do to become rich.

From changing your mentality to extra learning, check out 10 actions you can take to get rich at an incredibly high speed.

1. Think of four ways you could make money outside of your job.

If you want to be rich it is important to stop thinking “I earn enough” and to start thinking “I could earn more.” Write down four ways you could earn money outside of your main job. From creating an e-book to selling on Amazon, there are many ways you could increase your income that would only require a little effort and time.

2. Learn in your free time.

To move up in your career and become rich, you must master new skills and knowledge in your area. Instead of just focusing on putting effort in at work, it can be very useful to learn more about your area in your free time. There are many ways you can do this, from reading books to listening to pod-casts to attending classes and seminars. Remember that the more skilled you are, the more you deserve to earn.

3. Set specific financial goals.

“If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always gotten.” This phrase is very true when it comes to finances, with many people believing that their financial goals are to pay the rent and bills. If you are already paying your rent and bills, it is time to set higher financial goals, such as saving, paying off debt or increasing your annual income. Mentality is important; always think big when it comes to your finances.

4. Make money your friend instead of your enemy.

Money pays for your home and it is has the ability to give you security, so it is important to view money as your friend and not your enemy. Write down 20 things you are glad your money pays for, such as your home and your new shoes. If you struggle to see money in a positive light, remind yourself that money can either open doors or closes doors—it is your choice.

5. Solve a problem every week.

Rich people choose to focus on solving problems, rather than complaining about them. This attitude helps to improve your solution thinking, opening your eyes up to new financial opportunities and chances that could benefit you. Write down a financial problem once a week, such as raising your income or figuring out how to lower the price of your grocery shop, and come up with a practical solution to solve the problem. Keep going until you have improved all aspects of your financial situation.

6. Get a library card.

A library card is excellent value for money and opens up new worlds of knowledge. Having a library card gives you the option to expand your knowledge in your chosen area without spending too much, which is the perfect tactic to help you earn more money within your career.

7. Do something that pushes you out of your comfort zone.

Many people are too scared to make uncomfortable decisions, but rich people are often more willing to. From leaving your job so you can start your own business to asking for a raise, many choices that seem initially difficult will be financially rewarding. Do something that makes you feel uncomfortable but may improve your life situation. It is pleasant to be comfortable, but it is much better to improve your life and financial situation.

8. Track your financial progress every month.

If you are bad with spending, it doesn’t matter if you are rich or not. You could have a high wage and still be left with little to nothing by the end of the month. Write down your income, as well as all of your out-going expenses. Is there anything that costs too much which you can cut out? This gives you a chance to see the bigger picture and allows you to make changes that will improve your finances.

9. Prioritize your goals.

You probably already have financial goals, but if you having too many can mean none of your goals are met. Instead of simultaneously trying to save up for a car and a holiday while paying off debt, decide which goal is your most important. Focus on achieving that, and then move on to your next goal.

10. Start investing wisely.

If you have no experience of investing, don’t start to invest without knowledge. Speak to a professional about how to invest well, or read up on the subject on-line. When you are educated and knowledgeable about investing, make small investments in business you know will be lucrative.

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5 Ways To Expand Your Network Like A High Achiever

You’ve probably heard the saying, “It’s not what you know, but who you know.” While I don’t advocate using personal relationships as leverage to get ahead in your career, especially over actually having the talent necessary to succeed. There’s nothing wrong with creating a network of qualified individuals to help you get where you want to be. But it’s not always easy to create these networks. You have to step out of your comfort zone and put yourself “out there” for the world to see. You could have all the talent in the world, but if you fail to get yourself noticed, it could end up going completely to waste.

1. Write for a variety of audiences

When I started writing for Lifehack, I was pretty excited when one of my first articles got shared over 1,000 times in one week. After about six months of creating content for Lifehack, I have had almost 200 articles published, and have over 130,000 shares under my belt. My articles have been reprinted by blogs ranging in focus from parenting and education to relationship and career advice. What started as a way for me to earn a few extra bucks here and there has turned into a full-time passion. I’ve reached more people than I ever thought possible, all because I’ve been able to write for many different purposes.

2. Be a middleman

I’ve not only made connections for myself, but I’ve also helped connect others to each other as well. Knowing a guy who knows a guy can be an important asset for your career. It shows that you’re not just looking out for yourself; you want things to get done. It might be as simple as putting a friend with a specific talent in touch with a company who has placed an ad that you yourself aren’t qualified to answer. Doing so will also put you on the receiving company’s radar in case an opening pops up that you are qualified for.

3. Look for a middleman

Like I said in the intro, it never hurts to have an “in.” But don’t just assume that you’re a shoe-in for a job just because you know someone that can put in a good word for you. By all means, use your connections to get your foot in the door, but once you get there, let your talents speak for themselves. If you think you can simply walk into a gig because your uncle works for the company, you’re not only going to look bad yourself, but you’re going to make your uncle look terrible, as well.

4. Follow up when meeting someone new

When you meet someone new who piques your interest or is in a position to help you further your career, it’s incredibly important to remember them on a personal level. Take note of everything they mention upon your first meeting, such as their interests or hobbies. These little tidbits might seem inconsequential, but if you bring them up during subsequent meetings it will show that you truly pay attention to people when they speak. It will also validate you in the eyes of the person you’re trying (ever so subtly) to impress.

5. Use social networks

You know Facebook isn’t just to post pictures of your cat, and Instagram isn’t just to show off your home-cooked meals, right? Social networks are a vital tool if you want to find new opportunities to advance your career. One article or post has the potential to go viral, increasing your chances of being noticed by someone who can help you skyrocket to success. The next time you’re scrolling through your Twitter feed, think about how you could produce something on the feed that could benefit others; it will end up benefiting you in the long run.

Featured photo credit: 3D Social Networking / Chris Potter via farm9.staticflickr.com

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5 Tailor-Made Tricks for Introverts to Nail Job Interviews

It could be said that introverts are the new black. But that was not always the case. Extroverts always seemed to have that extra advantage when it came to things like networking and landing a great job. After all, they are more outspoken, social, and certainly not shy about communicating their personal brand. This makes it easier for them to ace an interview, right? Not necessarily.

There’s been a shift where more people are embracing the hidden strengths of introverts. Remember, being an introvert doesn’t mean that you’re one way all of the time. In fact, you may share some traits attributed to extroverts depending on the situation; you just naturally lean more to one side.

You see, introverts are not a quiet group; they can be expressive. They are not meek, but strong. They are not boring, but interesting. Unfortunately, as an introvert, you do not have much time on your side for an interviewer to figure out your personality. You have to make a good impression, fast.

Instead of wearing a “Pardon my demeanor, I’m an introvert” sign, try these 5 tailor-made tricks to nail job interviews.

1. Clear your calendar  

It’s no secret that social activities are often challenging for introverts. Introverts charge internally when they are alone. Being around others may make them feel uncomfortable and judged — for not being the social butterfly others think they should be.

This feeling is even more amplified when it comes to a job interview.  For that reason, make sure you are fully charged the day of your interview. Keep your schedule light beforehand so that you have the quiet time needed to prepare and gather your thoughts. This will help you feel more energized so you can showcase your personality — without feeling burned out.

2. Prepare clear talking points

Saying the right thing in an interview is important to anyone — regardless of personality type. But for introverts, it’s even more nerve wrecking. You don’t feel comfortable naturally “winging” it like extroverts, so it’s important to have key points already in your head.

It’s not to say you must rehearse until you sound like the captain of the debate team. But you should specifically focus on stories that show how your skill-set matches the job description. Why? Because you can bet the interviewer will ask you to elaborate on experience that’s related to the job. Your talking points will be a great way to easily answer questions, and show how you are an important part of your team’s success.

3. Lean on your listening skills

An advantage that introverts have over extroverts is their ability to internally analyze their surroundings and take in information. Susan Cain, author of Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking says, “Introverts often work more slowly and deliberately. They like to focus on one task at a time and can have mighty powers of concentration.”

Good listening skills are the key to tapping into the expectations of an interviewer.  Use your ability to take in information as a trick to be in tune with what is being asked of you in that role.  You’ll not only be on the mark with your answers, but you will also show the interviewer that you understand exactly what is needed to hit the ground running.

4. Match your interviewer’s communication style

This trick is something that will help you stay focused on your interviewer and not your own nervousness. Take note of your interviewer’s style: Is he or she energetic? Straight forward? Laid back? Don’t go crazy being someone you are not, but use these cues as a gauge of how to mirror their style.

When you are being interviewed, your interviewer is not only testing your skills, but also wants to see if you are someone they can easily interact with. They want to know about your personality on a casual level. Many introverts do not like small talk, but it’s important that you positively engage with your interviewer throughout the process.

Matching the way your interviewer communicates will ensure that you do not come off as overly shy, uninterested, or hard to manage. You will make a great impression and show that you are personable and adaptable.

5. Watch your non-verbal cues

Even if you’ve mastered talking about your experience, there’s one thing that can hinder your interview success: your body language. Being naturally shy, introverts shrink when in the spotlight because they prefer to stay in the background. An interview puts you front stage and center, and it brings out non-verbal cues that make you appear less confident. Not to mention, the interviewer will be watching your every move from the moment you enter the door. (No pressure, though!)

Don’t let your body language stop you from closing the deal. Work on being aware of things you do when you’re nervous. Nonverbal cues include weak eye contact, a limp handshake, and fidgeting.  Focus on presenting a confident image by dressing professionally and keeping even facial expressions. Also, be mindful of verbal cues that show that you’re nervous. Using filler words such as “umm”  “like” or “you know” are dead giveaways.

Thinking about these things may make you even more nervous, but try not to worry. Instead, be aware of your behavior so that you can present your best image.

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