Tema: Desprezo
Apenas quem é desprezível pode ter medo de ser desprezado
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quinta-feira, setembro 17, 2015
Camões, Luís Vaz
Tema: Amor
Ó graves e insofríveis acidentes / Da Fortuna e do Amor! que penitência / Tão grave dais aos peitos inocentes!
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Ó graves e insofríveis acidentes / Da Fortuna e do Amor! que penitência / Tão grave dais aos peitos inocentes!
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Poe, Edgar
Para se ser feliz até um certo ponto é preciso ter-se sofrido até esse mesmo ponto
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Bossuet, Jacques
Ser feliz é ver sem inveja a felicidade dos outros e com alegria a felicidade comum
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Epicteto
A felicidade não consiste em adquirir nem em gozar, mas sim em nada desejar, consiste em ser livre
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D. Maria II
Quando se é perfeitamente feliz no nosso interior, suporta-se os aborrecimentos deste mundo com muito mais resignação.
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Baudelaire, Charles
O mais irritante no amor é que se trata do tipo de crime que exige um cúmplice
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7 Ways In Which Entrepreneurs Perceive The World Differently
Have you ever wondered how people like Donald Trump, Steve Jobs, or Oprah Winfrey are different than the average person? What is it that made them such successful entrepreneurs? Is it in their genes? Were they taught superior business skills the rest of the world wasn’t? What’s their trick?
While I might not have all of those answers, I certainly can tell you that they perceive the world differently. They have to, or else they wouldn’t be so wildly successful. As an entrepreneur myself, I can relate to that fact. I’m not a multi-billionaire, but I think have the scoop on at least 7 ways that entrepreneurs differ from traditional job-holders:
1. They see possibilities in everything
Have you ever wondered who invented the sticky note? Or the little plastic things on the end of your shoe laces? You have to wonder, “Why didn’t I think of that?” Entrepreneurs see possibilities everywhere. They see an opportunity, make a plan, and then follow through with it.
2. Their mind is always thinking 10 years ahead
Everything they think about has a consequence. It’s imperative to have a plan — not just for today or tomorrow. How are the decisions that they make today and tomorrow going to impact the next week, next month, next year, or even the next decade? That’s how entrepreneurs think. They think in terms of growth — growth toward the future.
3. They see the “Big Picture”
Entrepreneurs are “idea” people. They see the end result. Maybe they see a problem in the online dating world, and so they come up with an idea to create a funky new dating app. They can “see” and “feel” how it will work before they even make the first move. You could say they are visionaries.
4. They listen to their own inner voice, sometimes ignoring other people’s opinions
Let’s face it — people are not always supportive, especially when someone goes against the norm. I’m sure that there are many entrepreneurs out there who had a great idea that other people thought was crazy. Within the last 50 years, there have been some really interesting products that were first seen on TV. From Suzanne Somers’ Thigh Master to the “Veg-o-matic” to the “Perfect Bacon Bowl.” I’m sure these entrepreneurs gave people a lot of laughs with their unique ideas. But, imagine if the people who invented these listened to other people’s criticisms? They would never have found success.
5. They think in terms of “passive income”
The average job-going person hardly knows what the term “passive income” means. It means that you don’t put in time in exchange for a dollar. Entrepreneurs can be sitting on a yacht off the coast of Greece and still be earning money. That’s one of the benefits of being an entrepreneur. That’s not to say that it’s not a lot of hard work to get to the point where you can enjoy that passive income. Entrepreneurs think in terms of “making money while I’m having fun.”
6. They welcome risk
Anti-risk is programmed into many human beings. It makes sense — taking risks can be life-threatening. Many people shy away from risk because all they think of is “loss.” But entrepreneurs think “gain” when they take a risk. Entrepreneurs thrive off the risks they take. As the saying goes, “Nothing ventured, nothing gained.” It’s not possible to be successful if you don’t take some risks along the way.
7. They are endlessly optimistic
Donald Trump has lost his fortune before — all of it. But did that stop him from taking more risks and starting over? Did he roll over and say “Oh, shucks! I guess the odds are against me. I think I’ll just give up.” Absolutely not. He came up with a way to make his money back. He didn’t let so-called setbacks stop him. He thrived under the pressure of rebuilding his empire. He is an optimist in his business life.
Entrepreneurship is more than a “career choice.” It’s a way of being. Some people just have it in their blood. Some entrepreneurs are more successful than others, but they all share these ways of perceiving the world. It doesn’t make them better than the rest of the world, but they do have some unique perspectives on life that we can all learn from.
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9 Reasons Why You’re Not A Millionaire Yet
When you ask the average Joe what his plans for the future are, “having lots of money” is a common reply. I mean, who wouldn’t want to be rich?
Unfortunately, this future ambition doesn’t get achieved by most people. And when you ask these people why, what you’ll hear are excuses — reasons why they haven’t made their first million.
While these excuses seem like valid reasons to most of us, they’re really what’s hindering us from actually achieving this feat. Remove these excuses, and you’ll see an individual with the right strategy and goal to achieve. Here are nine reasons why most people never get to make their first million.
1. You are scared of failing
Those who fear failure never get to overcome it. And to accumulate great wealth, failure needs to be a part of the process. It is through failure that most of the successful people emerged today. So, instead of resisting failure, embrace it. And don’t see it as a blatant setback, but as you learning the ropes of what it takes to be a success.
2. You think you cannot be a success
This is negative thinking and it only takes you farther away from that millionaire status. Believe that you can succeed. The more you visualize yourself as a success, the closer you get to your goal. Sure, dreaming alone won’t make you a million, but it’s the first step. And if you lack motivation to dream, read books. You can start with “Think and Grow Rich” by Napoleon Hill.
3. You associate with the wrong people
The popular saying, “show me your friends and I’ll tell you who you are” holds very true here. How focused are the people around you? Are they also striving to achieve the kind of goals you want to achieve or are they drawing you back?
If the answers to these questions are negative, then your millionaire dream might not become a reality. Associate with people on the same mission as you because they are your support system. The right people will help make your journey easier and faster.
4. You think you’re limited by your background
This thought only creates a limit to what you can achieve. Your background can never prevent you from being successful. Individuals from some of the poorest families have become multi-millionaires today. If you think this untrue, read Oprah Winfrey’s grass to grace story. That should inspire you.
5. You do not have clear goals
When your goals aren’t clear, you will be unable to take clear actions. And when your actions are fuzzy, being a millionaire becomes impossible. Find out what you want, plan how you will get there, and get to work.
6. You are not using the internet
In other words, you don’t take advantage of trends and so you don’t have current information. To be a millionaire in this fast-paced era, you need to be fast-paced too. Thanks to the internet, a ton of millionaires have emerged. And all they did was take advantage of some of the tools available online.
While some wrote and sold books on Amazon or ClickBank, others built their followings and fortunes on social media. Many others took advantage of online shopping, setting up ecommerce stores with Magento, BigCommerce, or utilizing a combination of platforms like Shopify’s Facebook store.
You can do this too! Search out resources, find what suits you, and get started.
7. You prefer gambling to personal development
Gambling is a get rich quick scheme that doesn’t end well for most people. It has led many to bankruptcy and others to untimely death. Is that the path you want to follow? There’s nothing better than investing in your personal development. Do this by building your skills and increasing your knowledge in a field. I agree it’s not fast, and can be boring sometimes. But when you achieve success, your personal development is what would sustain it.
8. You have no mentor
Having no one to guide you on your quest for success will make your journey long, tiring, and sometimes disappointing. Having a mentor who has achieved what you’re looking to achieve will shorten your journey and get you to that millionaire status faster. A mentor removes guesswork and guides you in the right direction. That’s something to take advantage of.
9. You see money as a bad thing
It is true that money can’t buy happiness. But guess what? It can buy freedom. Having that mindset completely limits your motivation to earn more. As long as you keep seeing money as the enemy, all the points in this post will be of no use to you.
How badly do you really want to be a millionaire? As you strive toward your goal, have these reasons at the top of your mind. Stay focused with the right mindset and you’ll be shocked at the feats you’ll achieve and the success you’ll attain. Don’t stop wanting it and with time, you’ll get it!
Featured photo credit: Steven Depolo via flickr.com
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12 Things Only People Who’ve Ever Lived In Small Towns Would Understand
City dwellers often complain about their metropolitan lifestyles: The roads are too crowded, the apartments are too expensive, and the green spaces are few and far between. At some point, most urbanites daydream about moving to a small town — but if they ever do, they are in for a huge surprise. People from small towns know all too well that tight-knit communities come with their own unique set of problems that city dwellers will never be prepared for. Here are 12 problems small town people are too familiar with.
1. You Know Everyone Around
In a small town, you get to know your neighbors on an intimate level. Even in a town of a few thousand, it isn’t hard to recognize nearly everyone by face, if not by name and favorite ice cream flavor. You get used to being friendly with those around you.
2. So Smiling and Waving Becomes a Habit
You probably don’t notice how frequently you smile, wave, and make eye contact until you move out of your town and into the city. City-dwelling strangers are more often put off by your friendly behavior than enchanted by it, and you likely receive plenty of confused expressions — as well as some downright irritated responses.
3. You Never Meet Anyone From Home
When you finally venture outside your town, you should expect hundreds of questions about where you are from. Inevitably, when you answer, you will get hundreds of blank stares. No one knows about your small town, and you just have to get used to it.
4. Except the Super Weird Times You Do
Still, every once in a while you will meet one person who knows about your small town. Usually, that person grew up in some town or city nearby, but you might even encounter the only other person from your small town to escape. It will feel surprising and strange at first, but you should embrace that person as friend and confidante.
5. You Never Have Anywhere to Go
Small towns usually aren’t known for their active nightlife. When you grow up in a small town, you get used to the fact that there are no sensible places for young people to congregate besides home and school.
6. So Going Out Becomes a Beloved Pastime
Fortunately, there are miles of empty roads just waiting to be explored. In a big city, driving around aimlessly is equal parts boring and dangerous, but in small towns, joyrides are perhaps the most thrilling nighttime activity there is to enjoy. You roll down the windows, turn up the tunes, and drive.
7. You Don’t Know About Chain Stores
You are more often than not confused by the frequent news stories anticipating the death of the small business, because small business is basically all you have. Everything from the hardware store to the grocery store (the only two stores in town, really) is owned locally; your shopping opportunities are so limited that most newcomers have to transfer credit cards because shops don’t accept every type.
8. Until One Invades the Town and Causes Equal Amounts of Excitement and Distress
You remember the day Chipotle came to your town. There were lines down the block for weeks. Then all the small business owners in town agonized over the safety of their shops and restaurants, and the hubbub died down.
9. You Never Escape Past Relationships
It seems that everyone knows when you are dating, but everyone has an outrageously hard time remembering that you broke up. You will forever get questions regarding past partners, and worse, you will regularly see those partners everywhere you go. Closure is particularly hard to attain in such close quarters.
10. And Dating Your Ex’s Friend or Your Friend’s Ex Is the Only Option
Your high school graduating class was fewer than 100 people, which means you were fishing in a disturbingly small pond. Any potential partner you seek within town is going to have close connections with your ex, whether you like it or not. In small towns, the bro code does not apply.
11. You Always Dream of Moving Away
You habitually count down the years (and months, weeks, days, and minutes) until you are a full-fledged adult, free to fly to the big city of your choosing. You will live in a sophisticated area, visit cosmopolitan places, and meet exciting people. You hate your small town so much it hurts.
12. Until You Finally Do And You Miss Your Town Terribly
Yet, it hurts to leave, too. The big city certainly does offer more opportunity to learn and grow, but your small town is home, and it always will be.
Featured photo credit: Kecko via flickr.com
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Doing These 9 Things Right Before Big Presentations Will Make You A Great Public Speaker
Everyone has experienced that nervousness when they are faced with delivering a spectacular presentation. The most peculiar thing is that the rush always seems to come just minutes before the big moment. For even seasoned speakers, making a presentation before an audience still causes some tension and unease. What’s important is not whether the anxiety shows up, but how you actually handle such anxiety and battle the fright, yet come out bold and successful.
Courage is not an absence of fear, rather it is how you manage that fear and come out with confidence. Here are some things you should try before a big presentation in order to manage your anxiety. For more tips, check out this article from Business Insider.
1. Be on time
It is best to get into the right mood for a presentation by being at the venue on time. Being on time allows you to meet with your audience, psych yourself up, and test the electronic gadgets for the presentation. All these contribute to the right attitude that will help you excel with your presentation.
2. Meet your audience
Don’t stick to the old rule of being a speaker only. Learn to mingle and socialize. This skill will help you to be more relaxed and ease tension between you and your audience. It also proves to the audience that you are friendly and amiable.
3. Be prepared
Whether you like it or not, preparation is key to making a powerful presentation. But it goes beyond that — being comfortable with your location and your meeting room is helpful when passing along your message to your audience. Get to know the environment, the seating arrangement, lighting, microphone, and whatever other equipment is involved.
4. Visualize your success
Be positive. See the eventuality of the success of your presentation. Practice the first minute in your mind. Think of the witty line that you plan to use to grab the attention of your audience. By visualizing your success beforehand, you build yourself up to realizing the success of your presentation.
5. Pump yourself up
Go to the restroom. Take several deep breaths to maximize the amount of oxygen that gets into your lungs and drink some water. Even some light exercise or stretching will do you some good before you start that presentation by sending more oxygen to your brain. All these activities will get you more relaxed and settled before the presentation begins.
6. Smile
Smiling shows you are cheerful and appealing. It relaxes your body and assures your audience that you are glad to see them. By not betraying your confidence with a stern face, you are not only creating a pleasant attitude — you are also creating a less tense atmosphere.
7. Speak positively to yourself
Talking positively psychs you up to solidify your confidence and self-esteem. Use affirmations like, “I am a great speaker,” and “I am going to deliver a mind-blowing presentation.” Usually such affirmations become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
8. Understand that you are there to give
In the truest sense, you are making a presentation because you have something relevant to say. Your presentation is a gift to your audience. This should generate a feeling of enthusiasm, joy, and preparedness — not one of nervousness.
9. Take a standing position before speaking
Sitting before you are called to speak makes you dull and inactive. Be active by standing or pacing within a small space. Standing gives you the energy and mental alertness ahead of time. It allows every part of the body to get in tune with making your presentation.
Taking advantage of the few minutes before your presentation by getting active and doing the above things will be beneficial to helping you deliver a good speech.
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5 Cognitive Biases That Have Kept You From Achieving Full Potential
We like to think of ourselves as smart, rational, logical people who make good decisions. But in reality, we sometimes have poor judgment and make really bad choices. Every day, we have cognitive biases that influence our thinking. Why should we care? These biases have a major influence on the decision making process.
We have hundreds of cognitive biases, and some keep us from achieving our full potential. Psychologists have been researching them for decades. Here are some of the biases that could be holding you back:
1. The Current Moment Bias
This bias feeds the immediate gratification effect. We would much rather have pleasure now and save pain for later. If you have ever indulged in unhealthy food choices while trying hard to lose weight, or tend to overspend money instead of saving for the future, you have been victim of the current moment bias.
What to do:
- When you want to make a big purchase, wait for a predetermined amount of time before you purchase the item. This will help you avoid splurging on things you don’t love. For example, plan to wait one week for purchases that amount to $100 and one month for purchases $1000 or more.
- Plan healthy meals ahead of time so you are less likely to chow down on junk food when you walk in the door from work. Decide in advance what you’ll order at restaurants to avoid making unhealthy spur-of-the-moment dinner choices.
2. The Confirmation Bias
The confirmation bias, according to Science Daily, is a tendency to search for or interpret information in a way that confirms your preconceptions. This can hold you back from achieving full potential, because being closed-minded can limit your ability to learn, grow, and improve yourself and your life.
What to do:
- Be open to other points of view and new possibilities. Be aware that you have certain beliefs, and be willing to evaluate your belief systems objectively.
3. The Framing Effect
Framing information, either positively or negatively, can have a huge impact on how it is received.
Here’s an example of the framing effect in an article by Sam McRoberts:
- Doctor A: “With proper treatment, you have an 80 percent chance of a full recovery.”
- Doctor B: “There’s a 20 percent chance that you’ll die after being treated for this illness.”
Although Doctors A and B are providing the same information, they are presenting it differently, which can greatly affect patients’ perceptions. An 80 percent change of recovery sounds much better than a 20 percent chance of dying.
How does this hold you back? When information is presented to you either positively or negatively, it can cause you to make poor decisions.
What to do:
- Be aware of how information is presented to you in order to persuade you to take a certain action.
- Look at both sides of statistics. For example, if you are told “this meat is 90% lean,” be aware that it is the same as hearing “this beef is 10% fat.”
- Consider how you present information to others.
4. The Bandwagon Effect
The bandwagon effect is when we follow the actions or beliefs of a large group of people. According to Dr. Mohammed Ali N M, we do this either because we desire to conform, or because we receive our information from others. The bandwagon effect can hold us back at times when we follow trends and fads without doing our research.
What to do:
- Put careful thought into your decisions, and don’t jump into something just because “everyone else” tells you to.
5. The Projection Bias
The projection bias describes our assumption that other people think like we do. We tend to overestimate how common our thoughts and beliefs are. We assume that our way of thinking about things is common among the majority. This can hold us back significantly in life because it causes us to believe we know exactly what people want. We tend to assume we know the priorities, motivations, attitudes, and beliefs of others, when in reality we don’t. This can affect us negatively in relationships in our personal lives and in our careers.
What to do:
- Make a point of asking people questions instead of assuming they think like you do.
Simply being aware of these biases can help you live a better life. Each day, we make thousands of decisions, and realizing the biases that affect your judgment can help you make better informed, well-thought decisions.
Featured photo credit: The Thinker / Dan McKay via flickr.com
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14 Dangerous Foods That You Should Never Feed Your Dog
As the holiday season approaches, it can be more difficult than ever not to share your food with your pup. Their big, puppy-dog eyes are bound to follow you around your home while you try to eat but, according to the Huffington Post, under no circumstances should you share these fourteen foods with your dog. These foods include: alcohol, avocado, raisins, bones, walnuts, onions, dairy, grapes and mushrooms. Chocolate is a particularly notorious as a no-no for dogs, as it’s core ingredient can be toxic to your canine’s heart and nervous system.
There are, however, some alternatives to boring dog food that you can share with your dog. Purebred Breeds recommends plain baked sweet potatoes, steamed string beans, carrots, broccoli, turkey and canned pumpkins as fantastic alternatives to the more dangerous foods, you can even follow their recipes to make sure your dog has the best holiday season ever. Or, you can create some wonderful, homemade doggy treats such as peanut butter, banana and parsley bites and mint buckwheat biscuits.
Featured photo credit: Huffington Post via huffingtonpost.com
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8 Qualities Every Independent Woman Should Look For In A Boyfriend
You prize your independence. You are the one who can handle your job challenges, problems with coworkers and family issues without running for help. When it comes to your boyfriend, you have some specific things in mind which will fit in with your lifestyle. Here is a list of things you are looking for. These are not set in stone, just a set of guidelines. If your boyfriend fails to meet one or two of these criteria, don’t kick him out. After all, one of your great qualities as an independent woman is your talent for flexibility, compromise and problem solving! You might have to do some work or if you think it is not worth it, you might move on.
1. He gives you your personal space
You love having a little time, space, and some oxygen for yourself. He knows that and loves his private space too. There are no problems if you are away for a weekend or out with the girls. He does not cling and he does not pester you with texts and phone calls while you are enjoying yourself. It is, of course reciprocal because you do not believe in 24/7 surveillance either. But you love those funny messages at unexpected times.
2. He’s there when you need him
You know the type of guy who wants to become your second dad and is overprotective. No thanks! You have learned from early on to be self-sufficient, capable and strong. You want him there though when you need support, encouragement, and advice and he always is.
You know that there is a certain ambiguity in your independence. You always want to show your strength and capabilities but at the same time you feel the need to be cared for emotionally and socially. You can list countless examples when he has taken care of you in moments of doubt, sadness, and even exhaustion.
3. He knows the ups and downs of living together
Are you going to lose some of your independence if you start living together? He probably has been through that himself. Maybe it was a small apartment and the pressure of being together for much of the time ruined the last relationship. He is prepared to examine with you all the pros and cons. He is aware, like you are, of the risks. Most research now indicates that cohabiting or marriage is not the problem. It is the age of the partners and their maturity which really makes the difference. You both know the dangers of mindlessly drifting into cohabitation.
4. He does not feel threatened
You know that some men actually feel a little intimidated or even threatened by an independent woman. They may even feel less masculine when confronted with the woman’s autonomy. But, you know that your boyfriend does not expect you be more clingy and less independent once you become a couple. Your relationship is not about giving up what you have fought for and there is no question of being conquered.
5. He knows your real agenda
Fortunately, your boyfriend is far more enlightened than those guys who think that a woman’s main ambition is to get a partner and settle down! You both have great ideas on how you will work together as equal partners in finding happiness together. Your boyfriend knows that romance is just the icing on the cake. Baking and eating the cake requires commitment and hard work.
6. He knows that no partner needs to dominate
We all know the stories about who is “wearing the pants” in certain households. Fortunately, couples have evolved and there is no need for domination or even power struggles or when making decisions. You both believe in a partnership so there is no need for one of you to hold all the cards.
He respects you and your decisions and you feel safe in his presence. This is a biggie as 95% of domestic violence victims all over the world are women. There are no signs of emotional or physical abuse and that is why you feel totally secure.
7. He understands your goals and ambitions
Problems can arise when your boyfriend may not be ambitious at all at work and does not have any great goals, apart from surviving till Friday! You don’t relate to being not motivated at all and working in a dead-end job. This is where the motivation gap may cause problems because your long hours and getting up early may not suit your boyfriend at all and may lead him to loneliness, frustration and insecurity.
This problem is solved when you both have goals and ambitions and they are not necessarily tied to the world of work. Your boyfriend may be highly motivated in sports or working out and is also driven by ambition. You both understand your goals because you have discussed them a lot.
8. He knows how to communicate
Guess what the number one problem is in most relationships? It is not sex or money but lack of communication. Most couples cannot deal with arguments which tend to start and never finish. You know the ones where you or he threatens to leave or take some other drastic action.
Your boyfriend is an effective communicator because he never brings up old issues or introduces third parties (“Your Mom agrees with me”). He also concentrates on the present issue and avoids exaggerating by refusing to use the words “you always” and “you never”. He knows that these tend to fudge the real issues as you yourself understand only too well. You both know that arguments resolve differences and are not to be used again and again!
Have you been able to tick off all the above points? How did your boyfriend do and did you pass the test yourself?
Featured photo credit: Couple in love/ Pedro Ribeiro Simoes via flickr.com
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