Berdiaev, Nikolai

Tema: Liberdade
A liberdade é, antes de tudo, o direito à desigualdade

via @notiun

Soyinka, Wole

Tema: Arte
O meu horizonte sobre a humanidade é ampliado pela leitura dos escritores de poemas, por ver um quadro, ouvir alguma música, alguma ópera, e isso não tem nada a ver com a volátil condição humana, ou luta, ou algo assim. Isso enriquece-me como ser humano.

via @notiun

Zola, Émile

Tema: Amor
O amor, como as andorinhas, dá felicidade às casas

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Conrad, Joseph

Tema: Ambição
Toda a ambição é legítima, salvo as que se erguem sobre as misérias e as crendices da humanidade.

via @notiun

Flaubert, Gustave

Tema: Estupidez
A estupidez não está de um lado e o espírito do outro. É como o vício e a virtude; sagaz é quem os distingue

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La Rochefoucauld, François

Tema: Assunto
Quem se dedica aos assuntos menores raramente conseguir atingir os grandes

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Eurípedes

A felicidade é igual, quer se encontre numa pessoa rica quer numa de condição humilde

@notiun

Antunes, António Lobo

Nós somos felizes só por instantes. Temos medo de viver um grande amor. Estamos muito mais habituados a sofrer do que a ser felizes.

@notiun

Freitas, Pedro Chagas

Ser feliz todos os dias é uma seca porque nunca pensaste em nivelar a tua felicidade por cima – em ver na felicidade o estrato mais baixo da tua respiração por dentro da vida. Ser feliz não é um privilégio - muito menos uma bênção. Ser feliz é um direito. Um irrevogável direito.

@notiun

Shakespeare, William

As ideias das pessoas são pedaços da sua felicidade

@notiun

Alain

A felicidade não é algo que se persegue, mas algo que se tem. Não existindo essa posse, é apenas uma palavra

@notiun

Stendhal

O amor é o milagre da civilização

via @notiun

Munro, Alice

Ele nunca quis estar longe dela. Ela tinha a chama da vida.

via @notiun

Freitas, Pedro Chagas

O amor não é saudável, o amor não é razoável, o amor não é sensato. O amor é para ser aquilo que não tem razão, aquilo que não explicação, aquilo que te tira da tua mão.

via @notiun

Chamfort, Sébastien-Roch

Amar é uma necessidade do coração; fazer amor é uma ocupação do espírito

via @notiun

There’s a Secret Way to Host Your Website for Free

Ever wanted to make a website?

Well now you have no excuse. In fact, you can host your website for free using this little known trick. I’m not sure why, but nobody seems to know about this trick. I accidentally ran across this help post from Google, and suddenly realized that this is a feature that could be incredibly useful.

Let’s go through the steps

1. Download Google Drive and create a Google Drive account
2. Create an HTML website, or simply download a starter project
3. Now you have your website, but you need to host it! Upload the website files to Google Drive and put them in a new folder
4. Go to drive.google.com, sign in, right click on the folder with your website files and click “Get Link”
5. The link will look something like this:
   http://ift.tt/1xJAnEZ0B-2V84KLSI7AflhSLXJ6enAtTG1xSmNvUU5DMGFiSVpLVER6QWtiR0dKdkhpLWV5TV9LZkE
   See that part after the “id=”? Copy that long ID down in a separate notepad or word document. That’s your document ID. You’ll need it later.
6. Right click on the website folder again in Google Drive.
7. Click Share, then Advanced
8. Click Change, and set the permission to “Public – On the Web”. Your website is now accessible by anyone if they know how to access it.
9. Remember that document ID I had you write down? Well, now you can go to
   http://ift.tt/1lZwTerYOUR DOCUMENT ID GOES HERE
   This will take you to your website! Cool, huh?

So, how is this useful?

Well, now every change you make to your website files in your local google drive folder on your computer, not just on drive.google.com will be propagated to that website address. This allows you to make incremental changes to your website and see the results instantly by going back to that web address.

Now, there are other ways to do this on your computer such as visiting the file with your browser on a local host, but there are some features of websites that are blocked due to cross-domain security issues, which cannot be resolved unless you actually host the website.

What are the limitations?

To start, I’m not entirely sure how long this functionality will remain in Google Drive. It’s not a well-publicized feature, and so it probably also isn’t very highly utilized. Google tends to get rid of things that aren’t highly utilized, so we’ll see how long this lasts.

In addition, this hosting solution should only be used for rapid prototyping. DO NOT host your website on Google Drive permanently and tell all your friends to go visit that link, because it probably isn’t as secure as actually hosting your website on a dedicated or shared hosting site. This should only be used for personal or internal development purposes.

Finally, certain server languages cannot be run on Google Drive. Unfortunately this is trial and error so if you are not sure, you will have to experience at your own risk.

Is this really free, or are there some strings attached?

Other than the limitations I mentioned, there are no strings attached at all! It will not cost you a single penny! Now, you do have to keep in mind that once your website is complete and ready to launch to the public and attract millions of views to make you rich, you’re probably going to want to buy a dedicated or shared hosting solution. But then all you need to do is copy the website files over to your host, and BAM — Instant production-level website. Cool, huh?

Featured photo credit: Silhouette of cropped shot of a young man working from home using smart phone and notebook computer, man’s hands using smart phone in interior, man at his workplace using technology, flare light via shutterstock.com

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11 Things To Appreciate About Parenting A Teenager

There are many negative attitudes from the public and media towards teenagers, and parents of teens complain about how difficult they can be. As a parent of two teenagers myself, I believe there is much to appreciate about parenting them. The good far outweighs the bad. Whether you are a parent of teens yourself, or a parent of younger children who may be worrying about the teenage years, take a moment to think about these eleven things to appreciate about parenting a teenager.

1. They Know How to Behave in Public

Remember the days of toddler tantrums? The worry about how they would behave if you took them out to a restaurant, or to someone’s house? With your teens, that worry is gone. They may behave differently when they’re not with you, of course, but take comfort in knowing that when they’re out in public with you, they will probably behave appropriately.

2. They Can Entertain Themselves

Young children look to you to provide constant entertainment for them. Teens are far more self-sufficient in that regard. You could spend your time despairing about how long they spend on their devices, but instead appreciate that you now have some time for yourself.

3. They’re Transitioning and You’re There to See it

The teenage years are when they make the transition from child to adult. That’s a pretty amazing thing and you’re lucky enough to be there to see it. It’s scary and exciting. Don’t waste time yearning for when they were small. Observe them change, soak it up – it’s the biggest transition of their lives.

4. They Help You to Improve Your Negotiating Skills

If you were looking for an opportunity to improve your negotiating skills, then you’re in luck. It’s a difficult and confusing time for teenagers as their bodies and minds change. They won’t always deal with things in the best way and you will experience the full force of that first hand. You can spend all your time locking horns with them, or you can learn to pick your battles by letting the trivial things slide and focusing on the important things. You will make mistakes but over time you will learn the most effective way to negotiate with them. Take time to appreciate your new skills.

5. They’re Making Big Decisions With Your Help

During these years, they will be required to make big decisions about their future. Which subjects they want to drop, which they want to study further, what career they would like, what route they will choose to get there. You’re involved in those decisions, guiding them, helping them. Think about that for a moment – you’re helping human beings make plans that will affect the rest of their lives. Always remember what a privilege that is.

6. They Can Have Grown-Up Discussions With You

Your teens will be developing new, more informed, opinions on the world, and you will be able to have discussions with them on the same level. You will notice a shift as they look less and less to you to provide the answers. You will learn as much from them as they do from you. Make the most of these discussions whenever they are willing to have them. You will gain new insights into their character.

7. They Show You That They’re More Than Just Your Children

Of course you’ve always known that they were people in their own right, and not just your children, but you never really felt it before. Now you can imagine them as adults, as people making their way in the world without you. It’s bittersweet. Focus on the sweet.

8. They Have Genuine Shared Interests With You

Movies, books, places to visit. Almost overnight it seems they switch from childhood interests to adult ones like yours. You can go to the movie theater and see a film that you both genuinely want to see. No longer do days out have to be chosen based on the quality of the soft play area, or whether they have a kid-friendly menu. You can enjoy doing the same things together that you would also choose to do alone.

9. They Show You The Results of Your Earlier Parenting

This can be both good and bad of course, but there will be good. You may curse yourself for having let them get into some bad habits when they were young, but you will pat yourself on the back when you see the emergence of good traits that you know came from your parenting.

10. They Enable You to Have More Time For Yourself

The change is so gradual over the years that you may not notice it. You may not feel like you have more time for yourself, but just spend an hour with a parent of a young child, observe, and remember. You do have more time for yourself now.

11. They Teach You That Teenagers Are Actually Pretty Cool

If you haven’t really spent any time with teens since you were one yourself, then you’ve probably forgotten how cool they are. How funny, and optimistic, and full of life they can be, and how strong and loyal their friendships are. Watching them hanging out with their friends, enjoying their youth before having to take on adult responsibilities is a joy. Cherish those moments. Remember what it’s like to be young again.

Featured photo credit: Group of teens at the beach/Vladimir Pustovit via flickr.com

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Make Use Of The Last Of Summer!

As summer starts to wind down there always is a sense of depression that comes with it. The days get a bit shorter and returning to school looms; it still strikes dread into me even though it’s been so long since I had to worry about getting all my school supplies in order!

Yellow #2 pencils still make me break out in a cold sweat and to this day the sight of a school bus leaves me on the sidewalk in the fetal position.

So with the fall and start of the school year being the second New Year in my mind, here’s how you can make the best of the end of summer.

1. Enhance Your Diet By Embracing The Fall Harvest

If you are a foodie then this time of year is like Christmas. When the fall harvest begins to kick in a real abundance of true local and organic food becomes available.

Many people look to January 1st and the New Year to start getting healthy or losing weight but to me the end of summer and the fall is when you really want to undertake it. This is the time of year when you get food in its purest and healthiest state and it will be right in your own backyard.

Apple picking becomes a bigger activity and things like corn and squash are available everywhere. These are great, real whole foods that should make up the cornerstone of your diet. Do yourself a favor and start looking for farmers markets in your area as the amount of fresh local produce is at an all time high for the year. At a farmers market you know you are getting local, organic and most important, seasonal food.

So many of the foods we eat now are out of season as they are available year round, but getting foods when they are meant to be grown gets you a little more in tune with your environment and ultimately your health.

So get online and see what’s nearby you. The USDA has a Farmers Market Directory to search for them but you can even just do a Google search, and you might be surprised what’s close by! I pride myself on eating as natural and local as I can and I feel I’ve got my finger on the pulse of the local food scene where I live, but have recently searched online for other farmers markets in my area and found two within five minutes of my house! I had no idea they were even there, so get out there and meet the people that are actually growing this high quality food.

2. Make Use Of The Outdoors For Exercise

As a personal trainer I always tell clients to get out of the gym for the summer and make use of the outdoors, sunshine and warmer weather. I live in Canada and when we are buried up to our necks in snow half the year we crave those few months of summer. It’s what I dream of when I almost get hit by snow plows trying to dig my car out of ditch.

The one issue in summer is when it gets too hot and exercise outdoors is not the healthiest thing. Poor air quality from humidity, smog and blazing heat can actually do more harm then good. There is the potential for heat exhaustion, sun burn, sun stroke, and dehydration. When the weather starts to cool at the end of the summer and we go into the fall it becomes the ideal time to get outside to get healthy.

You still can get that healthy sun exposure and fresh air and the cool crispness of the weather has a motivating and energizing effect. So this is a great time for those longer runs, hikes, hill sprints, long bike rides, outdoor boot camps, yoga and even early morning walks.

Once again, get a jump on things earlier and embrace that crisp, healthy late summer/early fall weather.

3. Instead Of A Spring Cleaning, Do An End Of Summer Clean

This is where I will stress the point of looking at the fall/back to school time as the real New Year; and that means getting things organized and removing the clutter from your life.

Don’t wait until after a harsh winter to start making things fresh, get a jump on it at the end of summer while the weather is still good and really organize the things around you. The more clutter and disorganization around the more it impacts other areas of your life.

This is a good time to keep tackling those projects around the house, the yard or anything you can do to get things organized around you. That way, when you get out of those winter months you are farther ahead in the game than you normally would be.

Wrapping It Up

I love summer and I know you do too, it’s the time of year when things get to move a little slower and it feels like we can finally take a deep breath and relax. Just because it’s over doesn’t mean you need to lose motivation and feel let down!

Use the end of summer and the start of fall to make some improvements in your life, your health and your fitness and use that momentum to tackle the rest of the year and the winter head on.

But everyone needs to take it easy with all the pumpkin spice products and lattes…

Featured photo credit: amira_a via flickr.com

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10 Signs You Might Be In A Codependent Relationship

Codependency. Many people are not  familiar with the term codependency and are often not aware that they might struggle with it. Often a term used in recovery circles or counselling sessions, it is not usually talked about or brought up in regular conversations. The actual definition of codependency is excessive emotional or psychological reliance on a partner, typically a partner who requires support due to an illness or addiction.

In some way shape or form, everyone is codependent on another to a certain extent.  Codependency becomes unhealthy when it affects your overall mental health and happiness.

I was a part of two very codependent relationships and did not realise it until I wondered why both of my relationships ended the same way even though they were with two completely different people. After I learned about codependency and examined my motives for why I did certain things in relationships, I was able to overcome many of my codependent habits.

Here are 10 signs you might be in a codependent relationship.

1. You might not feel complete as a person without that relationship

Often times when you are in a codependent relationship and not aware of it, the relationship can be confused as a Twilight version of true love which is actually not healthy at all. Edward and Bella’s relationship is actually the perfect example of a codependent relationship: If you feel like you cannot function without the other person around or that your life would be over if the relationship ended, that is normally a sign of emotional codependence that is often confused with “true love”. A healthy relationship is when two people that are happy and healthy on their own choose to be together because both of their lives are improved when they are together.

2. You feel the other person cannot function without you around

Many times this is true if you are in a relationship where one person caters to another and truly believes they do so much for that person, they would not know what to do without you. I truly believed that in one of my past relationships. When the relationship ended, that person was just fine without me catering to every need or request they had. Human beings in general are pretty self reliant. When involved in a codependent relationship, many times one person in the relationship is using the other to get what they want and the other is truly convinced they are needed or have to stay in the relationship for the other person. If you have ever thought about leaving a relationship but talked yourself out of it because “they won’t know what to do without me, I have to stay” – that is a clear sign of codependency.

3. You do whatever you can to maintain peace in the relationship

This might be where the term “walking on eggshells” came from. If you are changing your actions and reactions to try and maintain peace in a relationship or your household due to another person’s outbursts or anger, this is a sign of codependency. Instead of choosing to set firm boundaries of how another person is allowed to treat you, you are actually repressing yourself as a person to try and avoid another person acting out and causing emotional harm. What is important here is what are your true motives in any given situation. Many victims of physical and emotional abuse live this way and it is probably the worst type of codependency.

4. You feel responsible for the other person’s thoughts or actions

You might feel like another person’s actions are a reflection of you. You might also feel that because they made a negative choice or decision, you are a failure. This is often true of parents and their children or people in dysfunctional relationships. In these types of situations it is important to realise that we are responsible for our own thoughts, actions and reactions and no one else’s. If we ever feel emotionally responsible for the choices someone else is making and it brings us anxiety or worry, that is a clear sign of codependency. I felt this way for a long while until I realised that no matter what I do or say, the other person is going to make their own choices even if they are not healthy ones. My only responsibility with another person’s actions is how I choose to respond and what I am willing to accept in the relationship.

5. You allow their decisions and behaviours to emotionally affect you

This is similar to number 4, yet different. This is typically described as a martyr role. If you continually experience anger, worry, anxiety or guilt from another person’s choices, that is a clear sign of codependency. If you worry about another person’s feelings or emotions because of a situation they are going through, that is codependency. When you allow what another person says or does to emotionally affect you, that is not a healthy relationship. When what another person says or does causes you to act out in anger or your addition, that is codependency. I experienced this many times until I was able to take a step back and realise that I have a choice of how I allow someone else’s words or actions to affect me. Often times when codependency is modelled in childhood and growing up, it is harder to break those habits but it is possible. The first step is focusing on yourself instead of the other person and accepting that you are only responsible for you. It is not our responsibility to own other people’s feelings, emotions or decisions.

6. Your self worth is wrapped up in the relationship

At one time I believed that I was only worth something if I was in a relationship. I was afraid to go somewhere alone for fear of being judged. I believed that I was someone because someone else loved me. I sometimes believed the person I was with was an extension of me. In many ways I had lost my own identity in the relationship and felt almost too emotionally connected to them as well. When you begin to live life for another instead of doing life alongside of someone, codependency can slowly grow and cause an unhealthy balance in the relationship. Once you are perfectly accepting of yourself and who you really are, you can be happy alone or in a relationship. Once you realise that, your self worth begins to grow and relationships begin to improve.

7. You have little or no boundaries with how the other person in the relationship treats you

Sometimes the prospect of being in a relationship where you are not treated the best is still better than being alone. Often times it is easy to stay in a relationship that has turned into a draining one instead of ending the relationship. Many times people are afraid of the unknown or being alone, so they stay.  If you currently deal with any issues like emotional or physical abuse it is time to evaluate and ask yourself if you actually deserve a relationship that is currently causing you harm. We often get in our lives what we allow. If we set hard and direct boundaries with consequences for negative behaviour, we then protect ourselves from further harm and gain the strength to walk away from harmful situations even if it means ending the relationship.

8. You feel that your negative relationship issues are the other person’s fault

This statement is often a hard one to swallow. For true victims of domestic violence, often times the majority is the other person’s fault but we still have the power to stop that behaviour by walking away.  In my relationships, I was not the drug or alcohol abuser so I believed there was nothing wrong with me. I was the victim because that person continued to destroy the relationship because of their actions or addictions. I was a blamer, and I did not want to take responsibility for the part I played in my past negative relationships. I was in a lot of denial about the truth of my past situations. Once I took ownership for the way I acted to every negative situation I was presented with, I was able to slowly change. I eventually realised I had a choice to stay on a roller coaster of addiction with my past partners, or I had the choice to get off. Once I set hard boundaries with the other person as to what I was and was not willing to accept, it became easier. The other person’s refusal to get help or improve their situation ultimately ended the relationship. When I set boundaries it was easier to handle that relationship ending because it was the other person’s choice to choose their addiction over getting help or working on the relationship.

9. You are extremely loyal in the relationship and often remain in harmful situations too long

This is often found in abusive relationships. With abuse, control is a huge factor in the relationship and along with fear or even threats, often the victim stays because they believe their abuser will follow through with those threats. Other times, it is a negative situation or relationship that may not be that severe. It could be a relationship where many years have been invested and they feel stuck or even believe that their life will always be wrapped up in chaos and negativity. The truth is, we have the power to choose how people treat us. If every woman experiencing domestic violence knew that they had to power to say no, true change could happen. When we invest time and energy into a relationship that is not a positive and enriching one, it is time to move on. Leaving the situation does not always have to be the answer if both parties are truly willing to work on the relationship together by tracking and encouraging positive change.

10. You feel it is your responsibility to “fix” everything for them

I was a fixer. If something went wrong or my partner screwed up, I was there to swoop in and cover it all up or at least do my best to try. Some parents who have children wrapped up in addiction have the fixing problem. For a while, I truly believed I had to stay in the relationship to save that person from their addiction or issues. I often believed I had the power to force people to change their bad decisions, but in fact that was all a lie. I cannot fix anyone but myself. Once I realised that I was harming the situation by allowing that person to continue to make bad decisions without having hard consequences, I stopped fixing and stopped allowing them to continue to act out in their addiction with me around. Instead, I took a step back and focused on myself.  Eventually I realised I had no control or power over the situation and I decided that it was time to get out of the chaotic relationship I had chosen to be a part of. The decision was not easy but it was the best one I could make for my emotional health and sanity.

Featured photo credit: Nick Fuentes via flickr.com

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8 Things You Should Try To Avoid Doing To Your Children That You Think Are Acts of Love

Parenting, in many ways, is the hardest activity to master. Ever.

There are many reasons why parenting is so tricky to get comfortable with. One of the biggest reasons is that no parenting book could possibly cover all of the different personalities that our children come to this world ready to express. So even when we figure out one technique that might work, our child soon changes and grows and needs something different from us.

Another reason is that parenting involves an enormous amount of energy.

Although some days with children may pass like a cool breeze, others feel like they may never end. Of course when you factor in home and job stress, and the fact that many parents come from dysfunctional families, then it’s easy to see how the choices we make as parents may not end up being in the best interests of our children.

Our intentions may be loving, but sometimes our actions fall short.

We can all benefit from practical suggestions for reducing stress, anxiety, and conflict in our homes and within our families. When we parent in a calm home environment, we will be more likely to make decisions that are better for both our children and ourselves.

1. Do not make your children feel responsible for your feelings.

Although making our children feel guilty is one of the oldest parenting tricks in the book, it is not a good idea to make our children feel responsible for how we are feeling. We may feel it’s harmless to say to a child, “If you do this for me, I won’t be sad anymore,” but doing so does not reflect the reality that we ourselves are responsible for feeling sad or happy, not our children.

Guilting our children into acting the way we want them to teaches them they must be on the lookout for how to take care of other people’s feelings — and this may be too heavy a burden to bear as they go on to develop relationships with others.

2. Do not make them feel responsible for your actions.

Just as we should avoid making children feel responsible for our feelings, we should avoid making them feel responsible for our actions. We are adults, after all. When we demonstrate to our children that we have calm in our hearts and are in control of how we speak and behave, children feel safe and develop a feeling of calm within their own hearts.

When we lose control and then say “You made me scream at you,” then our children are forced to imagine themselves as more powerful than they really are. Instead of feeling calm in their hearts, they end up feeling saddled with guilt.

When you feel you have reached your limit, take a few minutes to regain your composure, and then decide how you’d like to explore the issues at hand together with your child.

3. Try to avoid yelling or using physical touch to get your point across or to get your child’s attention.

It is important to help keep your child’s environment as safe and calm as possible. When we speak to our children with a moderate tone and volume, our children are able to listen at their best. When we scream at them, our children can only listen through their own feelings of anxiety, which does not set them up well to absorb information.

When we use our speech rather than our touch to communicate with our children, we allow them to feel safe physically and respected. This also, by the way, helps children learn how to negotiate and to cooperate with their siblings without yelling or touching each other, which does wonders for creating calm at home.

4. Don’t ignore signs that your child may be procrastinating.

If you sense your child is reluctant to get work done or is hesitating to make a choice or a change, use that sense to help your child figure out what is getting in the way. This may be difficult for you as a parent if you tend to procrastinate yourself, but helping your child find a path through difficult experiences will help him or her to avoid the stress of procrastinating.

5. Don’t try to micromanage your child’s life.

Parents use their most loving instincts when they help their children through life’s hurdles. We often try to spare them feelings of disappointment. We also try to ensure they have the best chances for personal success and fulfillment.

These efforts to protect our children from untoward circumstances may have costs themselves, however. When children are over-protected and micromanaged they may:

1. Not have faith in the decisions they make for themselves.

2. Expect success for themselves unreasonably.

3. Become somewhat passive in their actions as they may expect that others will help them to manage their own lives.

Step back as a parent and assist rather than direct. Enjoy the results.

6. Don’t try to purchase your children’s love.

We all can enjoy good food, fun experiences, and new goodies, but we should try to avoid “feeding” our children these things as expressions of our love for them. When we do, our children learn that they are loved for who they are, they don’t need stuff to fill them up with a false feeling of love, and they will find love in themselves and in other people, where it is in great supply.

7. Don’t make yourself miserable in order to keep your children satisfied.

When parents come from dysfunctional families, they may feel powerfully driven to avoid having their own children experience the negative feelings they did when they were young. This is a natural and loving impulse.

What can be problematic is when parents “protect” their children by refusing to allow certain feelings and experiences into the home, for example, anger, conflict, or imperfection. If you find yourself rigidly trying to protect your vision of what your family should look like and you believe your family members might be upset over your plans, consider seeking professional guidance or counseling in order to relieve the stress that might remain from your own childhood.

You’ll be able to parent with much greater clarity and ease once you do.

8. Don’t forget to take care of yourself.

All parents will, at some point, to choose their child’s best interest over their own. However, if this becomes routine, where the parent becomes overly self-sacrificing, stress will likely ensue in the home.

The parent will become stressed, frazzled, and resentful, and that will not be good for anyone in the family system. Show your children that they are important, but also remember to show them that you are important too. Important enough to have good boundaries, good self-care, and good judgment.

Have compassion for yourself as a parent and lend that self-compassion to your children when you are with them. Aim toward calm in the family environment, while understanding that there will be periods where calm may not be possible. Save your touch for warm embraces, congratulatory hugs, and genuine affection.

The intention you put into your parenting will enrich your experience tremendously.

Featured photo credit: Arguing Parents with Upset Little Girl via canva.com

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3 Vegetable Recipes for Kids Who Don’t Like Veggies

My daughter’s first solid food was sweet potato. As we added more foods to her baby menu, she learned to love avocado, kale, quinoa, peas, oats, broccoli, squash, and spinach. I figured I was totally winning and congratulated myself on raising such a healthy little girl. Then, she turned one and decided she wanted only pizza and quesadillas. Forever.

At some age, kids realize they have the power to make a choice in what they eat, and vegetables get a backseat to all things cracker and cheese related.

I realized very quickly that I needed to come up with some creative ways to make sure she got enough vegetables every day. While there are many ways to “sneak” in vegetables for little ones, these three recipes for kids are my favorite and make weekly appearances in our household. They are all extremely healthy, use a variety of ingredients, and are easy to make with things you probably already have on hand.

Don’t be surprised if you love them all as well! The chocolate zucchini muffins are especially delicious with your afternoon cup of coffee. Go ahead and sneak one during nap time, mama. You deserve it!

3 Vegetable Recipes for Kids Who Don’t Like Veggies

Banana Beet Bread

I actually used this bread as my daughter’s first birthday cake. This bread can be made in mini-loaf pans or as muffins. It’s vegan and uses a combination of oat and whole wheat flours. It’s delicious with almond butter or on its own.

Ingredients:

• 2 large ripe bananas, smashed with a fork
• 1/2 cup cooked and blended beets (I use frozen)
• 3 Tbsp melted coconut oil
• 3 tsp vanilla extract
• 1 tsp baking soda
• 3/4 cup whole wheat flour
• 3/4 cup oat flour
• 1 tsp cinnamon

Mix the wet ingredients with the smashed bananas. Mix the dry ingredients in a separate bowl, then combine all the ingredients together. The batter will be thick. Coat your mini loaf pan with coconut oil and fill with the batter (I usually get three mini loaves out of the batter). Bake at 375 degrees Fahrenheit for 22 minutes, or until done in the center.

Chocolate Zucchini Muffins

These are so delicious you won’t believe they are healthy and gluten free! Your kids will love them, and they make really good lunchbox additions. They won’t know that each batch has a full cup of zucchini!

Ingredients:

• 1 cup shredded raw zucchini
• 1/2 cup almond butter
• 1 large rip banana, mashed with a fork
• 1 egg
• 3 Tbsp maple syrup OR honey
• 1 tsp apple cider vinegar
• 1/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
• 2 Tbsp coconut flour
• 1/2 tsp baking soda
• 1/2 Tbsp chia seeds
• 1/3 cup mini chocolate chips (optional)
• 1/3 cup dried cranberries (optional)

Place all wet ingredients in a medium bowl and combine. Add the dry ingredients and mix until incorporated. Spray your muffin tin liberally with a non-stick spray. Bake at 375 degrees Fahrenheit for 20 minutes. Cool completely and store.

Broccoli Cheese Puffs

These puffs save the day in our house when she’s refusing all other green veggies I offer. I keep a batch in the freezer and put one straight into the toaster oven for five minutes until warm. The combination of broccoli, cheese, egg and bread crumbs makes this a protein-packed and filling meal addition!

Ingredients:

• 1 16 oz bag organic frozen broccoli
• 1 cup organic shredded mozzarella cheese
• 1 beaten egg
• 1/2 cup bread crumbs

Cook and drain the frozen broccoli. Place all the broccoli in a blender and blend well. Place in a medium-sized bowl and combine with all other ingredients. Shape into patties and place on a silicone-lined baking sheet. Cook at 375 degrees Fahrenheit for 18-20 minutes, or until the edges are slightly golden. Cool completely and place in a single layer in a large ziplock and move to the freezer.

Featured photo credit: Viktor Hanacek via picjumbo.com

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Personal Story: How I Used Meditation and Natural Remedies to Balance Type 1 Diabetes

I decided to write this story in order to “celebrate” my twentieth diabetes anniversary this fall. In this article, I’m going to tell you a bit more about how it is to live with this particular medical condition and what you can do to improve your overall health — from an entrepreneur’s perspective. Read on to learn how to balance your diabetes when you are your own boss, and the boss of others.

A few words about life with diabetes

Let me just start with this: It’s not that bad. I was diagnosed with Type-1 Diabetes at a very young age — 6 years old, to be exact. And I have this haunting memory: as optimistic as I may sound, I was devastated when I found out that I had it.

For almost a year, I stayed indoors, didn’t go to school, and thought it can’t get worse than this. Then, something happened during a family trip. There was this parking lot we entered with our car. In a car close to us there was a girl, probably around my age at the time. She waved and smiled at me. I half smiled and waved back. I expected her to run towards me when her dad stopped the car. But then the door opened and she didn’t get out. Her dad came and picked her up and placed her in a wheelchair. And that’s when it hit me: it CAN get worse than my diabetes. Stupid me!

From that point on, I was a different person. The first thing when you get diagnosed is to accept it. It took me a year, but it shouldn’t have. This year, in May, I turned 26. And now, closing in, is my twentieth diabetes anniversary this fall. Growing up with Diabetes, it sort of became part of who I am as a person. I talked about it two years ago in an interview for DiabetesMine.

The bottom line: you should know that you are a fighter, a survivor, a “doer.” You know that you can’t give up. You learn to live with it and adapt it to your lifestyle. Note that I’m not advising for the opposite, to build your life around your condition. And that is the perfect foundation for entrepreneurship, as well — one of the reasons why I encourage people who have a medical condition to go into business. But this isn’t enough to trigger the hunger for being someone above average, for starting your own thing and for doing an amazing job at being happy and balanced.

Family support, before everything else…

I remember clearly the impact my family had on me.

My dad is the type to always encourage me to find my own way. He would always be there to remind me if I screwed up, but I don’t think there is one person more proud of my achievements than he is.

I remember, in forth grade, he came home after sealing a deal and showed me this 100 USD bill: “This is money, sweetie.” I reached out to grab it. He then added: “Sweetie, this is our money. If you want your own, you have to earn it.” That’s how I became “obsessed” with American dollars. And it’s probably the earliest business advice I ever received.

Since we’re both diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes, I feel he gets me better than anyone in a way. The scariest thing is when one of us is sick or when things get out of hand. As twisted as it may sound, I’m lucky to have someone in the family with the exact same medical condition.

My mom helped me in another way: she made me feel comfortable with my diabetes and never settle for less just because “I have it.” I had to own it. She also taught me that no matter the situation, I should always take my work seriously: as an employee or as a self-employed individual. And she taught me about responsibilities, how you should feed the mouths you’re responsible for before feeding your own. That’s a great lesson when you have your own business: always pay the people you work with, your employees, your collaborators, before you pay yourself.

My big brother is the one who told me about remote work. He also encouraged me to learn design and HTML in 2004. He would bring me home software versions from the University (he studied IT), so I could have access to Flash, Photoshop, and later on, Adobe Creative Suite. Whenever I had trouble with fixing something or installing a program, he would just say “Google it,” or “Read online about the new upgrades.” That educated me in searching and eventually finding solutions on my own, without relying too much on others.

It’s important to have support from your loved ones. My brother and I always say that it’s truly sad not to have a family in this world, because you won’t find genuine support elsewhere, no matter the quality of relationships you have with other people. That includes support for your diabetes. Here’s the thing: in life, as much as in business, you need a leap of faith. Just like Yoda says “Do. Or do not. There is no try.” You either do it, or you don’t. I know it sounds a bit like a cliché, but taking your weaknesses and limits and transforming them into strengths is not impossible. It’s just a matter of perspective: what might seem an early disadvantage could later become a core advantage.

Rule of thumb: keep your diabetes at a conversational level

Let me explain: imagine you are out in the park, every day, jogging. Jogging is healthy and sports in general go hand in hand with a healthy diet. I’ve always had a healthy diet and sports were always present in my life. Just like jogging, Diabetes should be kept at a level that allows you “to make conversation” – or at least, that’s what doctors say: “Don’t stress too much,” “Don’t laugh too hard,” “Don’t drink more than one bottle of beer or a glass of wine,” “Don’t stay up late working,” “Don’t cry or overexert yourself emotionally,” “Keep it at a decent level,” “Slow down.” The truth? These things are close to impossible when the adrenaline of starting your own business kicks in. Or when life kicks in, in general.

I’ve been there too and I get the impression that people with diabetes feel double the pressure and the stress compared to those who don’t have it. Maybe because we are more sensitive. For me, there were times when, no matter how hard I tried to keep that healthy mindset, I lost the secret recipe. Anxiety, stress, fear of failure, and the burdens of a “must succeed” mindset. I told myself that life doesn’t happen so that you can keep it to a “conversational level.” Life is tough. Business is tough. And it’s a challenge worth taking if you can take responsibility for your actions. But then you see your family hurting each time you don’t take care of your diabetes. And that’s not a good habit, is it?

So, the rule of thumb is to keep it at a conversational level. Try everything until you find the secret recipe for a healthy balanced “D” life.

The Secret Recipe

I might lie if I say there’s a universal one, but I’d like to outline what worked for me and my diabetes in terms of sports, meditation, and natural remedies.

1. Dancing

I loved all the dancing activities I did. I originally started with ballet around the age of 7, but had to quit at some point due to personal reasons. However, 2 years ago, I rediscovered dancing through tango. The dynamics are amazing, it’s one of those activities that you share with a dancing partner and that can help you in many ways. It starts with personal development, which is key in any stage of a medical condition. It helps in accepting and moving on, while being aware of it. I wrote an entire post about how tango changed me personally and professionally.

Bonus points: it helped me get over a breakup, a big step in the healing process.

2. Sports and the outdoors as forms of meditation

I love biking, jogging, playing basketball, football, badminton, and volleyball. To add more, I travel a lot, so walking long distances by foot is also included in the outdoor activities. Without sounding too funny, occasional mushroom-picking excursions also happen, especially during summer or autumn, when it’s “the season” in the mountainside of Romania.

I think sports and outdoor activities are amazing if there is fresh air involved. Combine it with some time off from the city ruckus and you get the perfect combination for a special type of meditation. Here is what you need to do in order to make it feel like meditation:

1. Be surrounded by fresh air, nature, and silence.
2. Be alone or surrounded just by people that you are absolutely comfortable with.
3. Either listen to nature (birds singing, rivers whispering, wind blowing) or to a relaxing tune.
4. Be relaxed and don’t let your mind run off to stressful places.
5. Induce yourself into a state of wellbeing, where your only goal is to have no goal.
6. Meditation is a journey, which involves a Start and Finish line, most of the time in the form of a cycle.
7. As you get into a state, you live through it, you also have to get out of it, in order to complete it.
8. Take everything at your own pace. No rush, no pressure.

3. Mindfulness as Meditation

I’m not a big fan of classic meditation techniques. Personally, I don’t like to sit in just one position to help me channel my energies. I like to work with my mind and body in creative and dynamic ways. Though I’m not also not a fan, yoga is highly recommended to Diabetes patients, due to its complexity and relaxation attributes.

Getting back to the topic of Mindfulness. I love practicing a series of simple-yet-efficient exercises, which I will list below.

Breathing Exercises

The first thing you can do in order to restore peace and bring your heartbeat to normal is to become aware of your breathing. When things get nasty for me and my blood sugar is in danger of rising at any minute, I take some time off, lie in my bed or on my couch, play some relaxing lyric-free music, and do breathing exercises. In order to create an even more relaxed environment, I either opt for aromatherapy or for Himalayan salt. If you own a Himalayan salt lamp at home, you can also leave that on, maybe 30 minutes prior to your exercises. Here is more info about its health benefits.

Back to breathing. I try to focus on my breathing as much as I can, and gradually breathe in and breathe out at a slower pace. Warning: don’t fall asleep, as you may induce yourself into a state of self hypnosis without planning to do so. I usually set a playlist with 10-15 minutes of instrumental music, after which I add more vivid songs with lyrics that are sure to wake me up. You don’t necessarily have to lie down, you can do it in a park, on a bench, or just by sitting in a nice lounge or café. The idea is to have as much comfort as possible and to center your attention on the breathing, not on the people passing by or the background sounds.

Concentration and Deconcentration Exercises

This one is a simple exercise you do in the morning and in the evening.

In the morning. After you wake up, while still lying in bed, close your eyes for 5 minutes, but be careful not to fall asleep again. Then, start counting from 0 to 10. Note that you won’t be just counting the numbers, you’ll also be drawing each number, slowly and in detail, with your mind. Without distractions. It takes time to be able to do it correctly, and if it gets boring with just numbers, try adding shapes, letters, or even an entire equation each morning. It works great by improving single-tasking and increasing the ability to focus.

In the evening. Just as you concentrate, you also have to “deconcentrate” — to disconnect, to undo it. So, at night when lying in bed before falling asleep, take another 5 minutes and count down, from 10 to 0. This time, you’ll be erasing the “drawings” you did in the morning. For extra relaxation, add some “breathe in, breathe out” breaks of 3 breaths for every 3 numbers. It works amazingly for getting a good night’s sleep. And with blood glucose running high in the morning (we call it the “Dawn effect“), you need a good sleep to temper the sugars down. Remember that any aggressive dreams or bad sleeping episodes can send the wrong signals to your liver, which may trigger a release of glucose deposits located in the organ.

Awareness Exercises

This one is also simple: an awareness exercise is something you practice everyday by being extremely conscious about it. For example, drinking your coffee in the morning. Here’s what I like to do:

1. Go to your favorite café and scan the place. Look for the best seat there is, with the best view.
2. Sit down, and before pulling out your devices from your bag, just be aware of what is happening next to you.
3. Smile when the waiter or waitress comes to get your order. Ask them how is their day with a positive tone.
4. While you wait for the coffee to be served, again, scan the café and notice the people around you. The decor. Look if anything is new, changed, or improved.
5. Sip your coffee while noticing the taste, the temperature, the texture, the feeling it gives you when you drink it.
6. Enjoy every last drop of it. And, if preferable, don’t add sweetener or sugar. Just enjoy it bitter and in its natural state.

4. Natural Remedies

While there is a huge debate surrounding the actual benefits of natural remedies for Type 1 Diabetes, I won’t argue in saying that as long as you don’t fully replace your daily insulin dose, you are safe.

I’ve always treated natural remedies as a way to add more value to your wellbeing, compared to using them as a sole healing method. Not to sound sarcastic, but after 20 years of Diabetes, it’s not like drinking herbal tea or rubbing minty oil will make my pancreas work like new. So, while treating this topic with extra care, here are a few things you can do or eat to balance your diabetes like a boss:

1. Herbal tea. Go to the countryside or look for organic/bio gardens where people grow their own herbal plants. Make them an offer they can’t refuse and get that stack of healthy benefits. Freshly picked plants from the field, if infused in hot water, usually taste like hay. And that, my friends, is healthy!
2. Salty and spicy. Don’t be afraid to try salty and spicy — just not in the usual way. Try Himalayan salt lamps, or any “salty” things that burn or melt really slowly, in order to recreate an environment similar to the seaside’s salty breeze. Spicy things are also good, especially if it’s really hot, because it makes you sweat. Did you know that we eliminate sugars and toxins by sweating? Not bad for a diabetic person.
3. Bitter fruits. There is nothing like eating raw bitter fruits, starting from grapefruit and continuing to wild fruits or (really) green bananas. They have little sugars, which is great for a snack and, in case you didn’t know, everything bitter helps the kidneys. Homemade remedies made by mom, passed down from her mom and grandma, always contained bitter plants and bitter fruits. And they always worked when our kidneys (my dad’s and I) would act finicky.
4. Raw fruit juices and homemade flavoured water. Keep in mind that fruit juices, even homemade, have more sugars than fruits eaten separately — possibly even doubling the amount of carbs. And that’s where flavored water comes in. As a member of the Diabetes gang, most of the time you end up enjoying something sweet only if your blood sugar is sort of low. Hence, my final “natural remedy” is actually water with different flavors. And since it’s summer, I’m carefully placing pieces of fruits in my ice cube forms, so that I can drink water at a room temperature with fruity ice cubes in it.

Some conclusions of my own after 20 years with “you know what”

I’ve seen cases of people who gave up fighting and just found an excuse in having diabetes — to justify their failures or, even worse, their complete ignorance. I don’t think I mentioned what could be perceived as a limitation when you’re a “D” Entrepreneur. Here is a list I came up with:

• You need sleep, a quiet environment and a healthy lifestyle
• You can’t afford to have too much pressure in your life
• You need to keep your health in check all the time
• You need positive people to surround you, because being depressed with diabetes is really bad for you
• You can’t eat too much sugar, too much greasy food, or junk food
• You have to take a break every now and then, otherwise your body won’t take it
• It’s ideal that you don’t smoke and keep your alcohol consumption limited
• You have to undergo regular check-ups
• People won’t understand you 100 per cent, and you can never expect them to
• People won’t know what is wrong with you unless you tell them what’s going on
• You have to stay focused and stick to your program
• There’s no other way but to live with it
• It’s difficult if you have a full-time stressful job, because just how much medical leave can you have access to?

If you take a look at it, what diabetes does to you is to send warnings that you have to be in control of your lifestyle, decisions, and choices.

Even a healthy person needs plenty of rest, a healthy way of life, and can’t afford to have too much stress and pressure. Everyone needs a check-up every now and then, and everyone needs positive people around them. Eating junk food is bad for everyone. We all need a break from time to time. We shouldn’t shouldn’t smoke or drink too much alcohol and so on. However, not everyone keeps these things at the forefront of their minds all the time — it all comes with being aware. 

I’ll end this article with a favorite quote from another young entrepreneur, one who touches on the need to not be perfect:

I don’t need a mask. You don’t need a mask. I don’t need to hide my imperfections. I’m human. You’re human.

I think it supports the healthy attitude towards having a “special” thing about yourself, even it it’s a medical condition. I think having diabetes helped me, because I learned that I had to live with it and deal with it. Which proved to be a good principle in my line of work and life in general.

Featured photo credit: [Photo credit: Dialysis Technician Salary] via flickr.com

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